Are you bored of the same old masturbation techniques? Curious about what else you can try to make it more enjoyable?
Perhaps you have a question about masturbation itself, wondering if it’s wrong to do it, or if it can lead to any health problems.
In this article, you’ll discover that masturbation is a completely normal and healthy behavior, and nothing to worry about (apart from the potential embarrassment of someone walking in on you!)
You’ll also find lots of enjoyable masturbation techniques you can try. And why it’s a great opportunity to develop your sexual stamina, which will make you a better lover in the future.
Is masturbation wrong or harmful?
Many cultures and religions throughout history deemed masturbation to be wrong, sinful or harmful. Sometimes it was to prevent young people from engaging in any form of sexual activity outside of marriage.
Nowadays though, it’s seen as a normal activity. As the well-respected medical website webmd.com says:
While it once was regarded as a perversion and a sign of a mental problem, masturbation now is regarded as a normal, healthy sexual activity that is pleasant, fulfilling, acceptable, and safe. It is a good way to experience sexual pleasure and can be done throughout life.
Can masturbating cause any health problems?
I know from the comments below that many guys worry about masturbating causing them health problems. Perhaps you’ve heard it can give you acne, make you weak or reduce your chance of having children.
However, all of these worries are based on myths and rumors, often spread in schools. As the British National Health Service website states:
Masturbation doesn’t cause any harm, either physically or mentally, even if you do it often. Your genitals may feel sore if you masturbate a lot in a short space of time.
So there you have it – the only risk is a bit of soreness if you do it too much.
Masturbation feels good, which is probably the main reason most people do it. It can also relieve sexual tension, especially for people who are on their own.
It can also be a safe alternative for people who want to avoid pregnancy, or if a partner has an illness preventing them from having sex.
If men need to donate sperm or be tested for fertility, they will need to masturbate. And sometimes it’s used as a therapy to help people deal with sexual dysfunction, especially guys who ejaculate too quickly.
So you can see that it has a range of uses, and is nothing to be embarrassed about.
1) Getting started – the basic technique
Most people learn early on that their hand is the perfect friend with benefits. It’s natural, effective and a lot of fun.
The basic technique is to grip your penis in your stronger hand with your fingers underneath and thumb on top.
You then move your hand up and down the shaft. Don’t go too hard or fast to start with – start slow and build up.
With some experimentation you should then be able to find the finger position, speed and strength of grip that most stimulates you.
If you like, you can lightly rub the head of the penis too, though without lubricant you might find it’s a bit too sensitive and dry. In which case it’s fine just to rub the shaft.
This is probably the oldest and most satisfying hands only masturbation technique. And you should be able to give yourself a satisfying orgasm using just this hand and method.
However, with a little creativity and variety, you can take it to a whole new level.
2) Your hand’s twin
- Try using only your other hand for a change.
- Try using both hands at the same time. If you can put them one next to the other on your shaft, lucky you. If not, you can try holding your penis between both palms pressed together.
- Use one hand to move up and down the shaft while the other stimulates the head of your penis.
- Wringing is a great double-handed technique. Imagine wringing the water out of a cloth by squeezing your hands in opposite directions. Just be a bit more gentle with yourself!
3) Don’t leave your balls hanging
It’s up to you to work out the best way to masturbate when including your balls; all guys are different, but here are some suggestions:
- Pull them slightly downwards while masturbating.
- Try caressing, stroking or tickling them – experiment to see what and where feels good.
- Try just holding them in a light, yet firm, grip with the other hand.
There’s also another good reason to spend some quality time with your balls. If you know what they feel like normally, you can look out for any unusual lumps – something all guys should do on a regular basis.
4) It’s not just women that have multiple erogenous zones
It’s a popular belief that only women have multiple erogenous zones. However, the truth is that your body is far more sensitive than you might think.
For example, try playing with your nipples and experiment with different strokes, pinches, pressure and movements.
Try caressing the inside of your thighs or your stomach. If there’s anywhere that you know you’re sensitive, don’t be afraid to explore yourself further with touch.
Some guys are more sensitive than others in different areas, so it’s up to you to find out what works for you. There are no rules, so get to know your own body and find out what floats your boat.
5) Moving south to the perineum
The Perineum is the area in-between your anus and balls. It’s a soft padded area which can be very sensitive to touch. You can try caressing it or pushing it gently with your spare hand.
Again, be creative and see what kind of stimulation, if any, gets you going.
6) Experiment with different positions
Here are 4 ways you can use different positions to mix things up from time to time:
- Hold your penis under your body, lying on your bed on top of your hand. Then thrust into your hand.
- Try kneeling or standing and thrusting into your hand.
- Change positions during your session: kneeling, standing, sitting, swapping hands or anything you can think of to add variety.
- Some readers have commented about how they sometimes like to put their penis between their thighs and then move their legs up and down. It’s a technique that’s probably not that common, but might be fun to explore if you can do the necessary yoga.
7) The best way to masturbate is with a realistic vagina
Of all the ideas in this article, this one has the most potential to improve the way you masturbate forever.
If you’re interested in techniques to maximize your pleasure and have stronger orgasms, this is the one for you.
Using a realistic vagina provides the perfect combination of intense stimulation and a challenge to your sexual stamina.
There are lots of companies that make male sex toys, but the one I recommend is Fleshlight. Their realistic vaginas are made from a high-quality, silky-soft material with a contoured interior that feels surprisingly similar to real sex.
If you’re interested in trying one, you can get some great deals on the official fleshlight website.
8) The slippery joys of lubricant
Whether you’re using a sex toy or just your hands, lubricant will get you another important step closer to actual sex.
Sex tends to be a wet and slippery affair, so a dry hand is lacking one of the key ingredients of a good time. Lubricant also makes it easier to stimulate the head of your penis, which can otherwise be a bit sensitive.
9) The double-edged sword of porn
Porn can be great if used the right way, but it can also be problematic if watched without any thought.
As you’ll find out in part 3, rushing masturbation isn’t the best way to go about things. And one thing which is sure to increase your arousal is fantasizing about your favorite adult movie star.
If you just switch it on, get yourself as excited as possible and rush to climax, you could accidentally train yourself to ejaculate quickly during sex too.
However, if you use it as a tool when learning how to masturbate in a controlled way, it’s a good way to test your ability to keep relaxed and calm.
10) Sex toys
- Cock rings and vibrating cock rings add extra pleasure, and can also help you keep an erection for longer.
- There are many different types of realistic vaginas, with extra features such as shower mounts, interactive videos and even virtual reality sex.
- Prostate massagers can stimulate your G-spot and enhance your orgasms.
To find out more about these, you might like to check out my review of the best male sex toys.
11) The holy grail of the male G-spot
Some cynical folk say the male G-spot is a lost Atlantis which never existed in the first place. Others claim that we are in fact blessed with 2 G-spots.
The first is the area on and around the frenulum, the string-like piece of flesh connecting the head of the penis with the shaft. You’ll probably find it’s a particularly sensitive area to rub.
The second G-spot might not appeal to everyone, but some guys like to include their anus when masturbating. For others, it’s probably a one-way street not to go down.
If you’re willing to explore here though, you could be in for an orgasm-heightening treat. Here’s how to find it:
- Wash your anus and hands before starting.
- Put some lubricant on your finger.
- Rub around the outside of your anus to begin with.
- Gently insert a finger as far as is comfortable.
- You can then just keep the finger inside while you masturbate with your other hand as normal, or move it gently in and out.
- The G-Spot is a small area a couple of inches inside. It should feel like a little ball just over an inch in diameter, which is actually the outside of the prostate. You can softly rub this spot if you manage to find it, and if it’s pleasurable.
Improve your sexual stamina
Many guys, especially during their teenage years, masturbate as quickly as possible. This is understandable because a) you don’t want anyone walking in on you, and b) it just kind of feels better going faster.
However, what I’m about to tell you is probably the most important point in this article:
Take your time!
I don’t want to worry you, but some guys end up ejaculating too quickly during sex, which can be frustrating for both them and their partner.
And it’s thought that one of the main reasons this happens is because of masturbating as fast as possible when younger.
But since you’re reading this, hopefully that’s never going to happen to you. And instead you can use your masturbation time to train yourself to become an awesome lover.
Read on to find out a bit more about the right way to go about things.
12) The human traffic light: the start and stop method
A great way to masturbate is undoubtedly the start and stop method. The simple version is that you set yourself a time – 20 minutes is good – and you don’t allow yourself to ejaculate until that time is up.
Every time you feel yourself getting close to the point of ejaculating, stop and take a breather for 30 to 60 seconds and then carry on. It might sound a bit frustrating and counter-intuitive, but it’s an effective way to develop your sexual endurance.
You may also find that by holding back for so long, when you finally let go, your orgasm will be even more powerful.
13) Kegels – relaxation and the last line of defense
Kegels are a secret weapon you can develop in the safety of your bedroom. They can be used as a last line of defense to stop yourself ejaculating.
As well as strengthening the muscles for holding back ejaculation, they also teach you which body parts to keep relaxed during sex.
In addition, they’re often used to get bigger and harder erections. They can also give you better bladder control when you’ve had too many beers. Bonus!
14) Breathe and relax
Breathing slowly and deeply while keeping your body relaxed is a useful skill to learn when masturbating. The reason being that tension will extinguish your sexual performance faster than a fireman’s hose on a wooden match.
So the next time you’re enjoying some solo sex time, remember to slow down and breathe.
15) The combo
Some guys have asked me which I personally think is the best technique overall. In my opinion, it’s to put together different methods to create the perfect combination of pleasure and purpose.
So I highly recommend trying the following: practice the start and stop technique while using a fake vagina and plenty of lubricant. Then when you use it, mix things up – sometimes lying down, sitting, standing, kneeling.
The idea is to get used to a range of different stimulation, develop your sexual stamina and maximize the pleasure you get from the experience.
Concerned about your penis size?
Many guys have left comments asking me about their penis size, wanting to know how they can make it bigger.
My advice is not to worry about this until you’re 21 years old, as your penis may keep growing until then.
But if this is something you worry about a lot, you can find some useful advice and tips in my article about penis size and enlargement techniques.