How To Turn A Girl On – 8 Top Tips

The secret has long been out that girls are just as crazy about sex as guys. The difference is that sex, for women, is a whole body and mind experience.

So you’ll need to understand the way she thinks and feels as well as the physical aspects to turning her on. In this article I’ll be taking a look at the bigger picture to help set you on your way to successfully turning your girl on every time.

1. Flatter her

Everybody loves a compliment. Telling a girl she’s attractive or sexy is a great way to get her on side. Try not to be too cheesy, just be genuine. Pick out her good points and tell her about them.

If you’re on a date, tell her when you meet how lovely she looks. She’ll probably have put effort into her appearance, and knowing that you noticed will mean a lot to her.

If you’re with your more long-term partner, then don’t allow the compliments to slide as the years go by. What turns a girl on varies over time, but she’ll still appreciate being told how beautiful you find her, especially if you want to get her in the mood for romance…

2. Be yourself

In fact, be the best version of yourself. Stand up tall and be confident. Women love a man who knows his own mind, who’s sure of himself and treats a lady well.

Don’t try too hard to impress and definitely don’t pretend to be something you’re not. We women know when a man is being false. One of the best ways to turn a woman on is to be endearing and attractive in the way that you present yourself to her.

3. Body language

man turning a woman on at the dinner table by flirtingWithout even opening your mouth, you can begin to get the interest of the girl you fancy. When you walk into a room, push your shoulders back, your chin up and walk tall.

If you’re on a date, choose your seat carefully when it comes to positioning yourself by her.

You want to be either directly opposite her so that you can lean in to the conversation and gaze into her eyes, or next to her so that you can begin to flirt with some touching.

By occasionally glancing at her lips when the moment is right, you’ll also start to send signals that you want to kiss her. This unconscious signal can be very powerful and encourage her to start thinking the same way – if she likes you.

4. Talk

Body language can only take you so far, but it helps to get a girl’s attention. Women love to talk, so the art of conversation can be a deal clincher when it comes to turning her on and taking things to the next level.

You might have already sent some flirty text messages to crank her excitement levels up a notch. Face to face, keep the momentum going and seduce her verbally.

Talk about sex casually in conversation so that she starts to think of you in a sexual way. You can slow down your speech and talk smoothly to increase the effect of this.

For us women especially, the thought of sex can be just as exciting as the act itself so think of this as foreplay. It’s all about saying the right things, at the right times and in the right way. You don’t have to be James Bond, but at least try to bring your own touch of style and class to what you say to her.

When things get a bit hotter, you could also share your fantasies with each other if you think you have that kind of chemistry going on. Tease before you please and light up her mind as well as her body.

5. Touch

Once you get chatting with a girl, you’ll have some clear signs as to whether she’s interested in you. The next step is to introduce some gentle touching. Brush your hand across her thigh or sweep past her arm and she’ll begin to notice.

If you do this a few times, she’ll not only get the hint that you want to feel her body, but she’ll begin to get excited and turned on.

If you feel that you can, the next level would be more deliberate touching motions – for example you could brush her hair back if it’s covering her face, or there are strands hanging.

Kissing and touching more erogenous zones (such as the neck or the more obvious breasts etc) comes next.

6. Take your time

Look for signals – if she seems receptive go to the next level, but be patient. The more effort you put in to understanding what turns her on, the better a sexual experience you’ll be rewarded with.

You’ll regret rushing things too much when the ‘teasing’ phase is over, so try to leave her wanting more. Foreplay doesn’t just mean 5 minutes of giving a woman oral sex and then on to the main thing.

It can mean just getting as far as a massage one night and nothing else. This adds to the excitement and anticipation and will definitely get her in the mood.

7. Set the scene

romantic candlesWomen are easily distracted and their minds can wander on to things such as work or finances. You need to make sure the ambiance is just right for any sexual activity.

Small things like wearing a great fragrance, fresh bed sheets or candles show us that you care and that is a huge aphrodisiac in itself.

Not only should you set the scene mentally and physically, but make sure the setting is just right and help her feel at ease.

8. What shouldn’t you do?

There are lots of tips for turning a woman on and getting her in the mood for sex, but there are also some things you should steer clear of.

  • Don’t lie – be yourself and start as you mean to go on by being honest.
  • Don’t pressure her (no means no).
  • Don’t be rude (you might think you’re joking and flirting but she could well be offended).
  • Don’t rush things. The flirting stages are often the most exciting and sexual tension can be just as fun as the sex itself.
  • Don’t neglect your personal grooming. While a man covered in grease from working on a D.I.Y. task can sometimes be a turn-on for us girls, most of the time we want you to be clean, smell good and be well-groomed.

The reward for turning her on successfully

The more effort you put into pressing the right physical and mental buttons, the greater the rewards. Obviously you’re going to be hoping for fantastic sex, but so will she.

It’s no secret that women have a harder time of reaching orgasm in general. Hopefully all this extra groundwork will stand you in good stead to give her an orgasm. Then both you and she will be rewarded for your thoughtfulness and effort.



    • Hi Trevor
      Ah, I think it’s interesting that men and women work differently in this respect. It keeps things fun!

  • A few of the first ones are somewhat obvious, but 6 and 7 are key. I find that if I take my time and with thorough foreplay, she will be begging for it. Good article.

  • Thanks for the interesting article and tips. I will try them on my gf and hope they help us have better sex life.

  • My girlfriend is a virgin, she want me to dis-virgin her but when ever I try she cries and I feel pity on her and stop she is threatening to hv sex with another guy if can’t do it so what should I do?

    • Hi Linus
      Do you know why she cries? Is it from physical pain, or does she cry for an emotional reason before you even have sex?

  • Nice tips. I like to romance my lady on a weekend evening. I know from many years together that if I just ask for sex, it ain’t happening. But if I take her for dinner, wine and dine her and lavish attention on her, things naturally go that way. My advice for the youngsters out there is to see the whole picture. If you want her body, you’ve gotta win her mind first…

    • Hi Isaac
      Thanks for sharing your thoughts – I couldn’t agree more! Seduction is an art form, and women generally find emotional and mental connection an important part of flirtation and romance.

    • Hi Rex
      The best advice I can offer in a brief comment is to take a good look around this website. There are lots of articles dealing with this issue, as it’s what I originally started the site to help with specifically. If you’re not sure where to start, take a look at the homepage, or the main article about premature ejaculation in the menu.

    • Long lasting cant be done over night……its like any other craft….where u need practice,pracice and practice plus focus till u become perfect….also live healthy

  • Wish I could learn in focus on how to have a oragasm besides being on top or by getting HEAD. Don’t kno what the problem is.

    • Hi there
      Some people just don’t orgasm in certain positions. There’s nothing wrong with that – it’s just the way we are. However, if you want to try to orgasm in other positions, then just experiment with how you do it. Or do the position that most gets you there, then change to a different position when you’re close and see if you can get there in that alternative position.

  • Hi,my Girl Friend Refused To Hav Sex With Me Becous Of My Manwood Is Too Big For Her Nd She Is A Virgine,what Can I Do

    • Hi there
      That’s a tricky problem. Either she’s genuinely worried about your size, or perhaps just not ready to lose her virginity yet. I’d ask her honestly if she feels ready, but is really worried about your size. If it really is your size, you might just have to reassure her that you will go very slowly and can control yourself so that you don’t fully enter her until she is able to cope with it, and enjoy it.
      The key, I think, is open and gentle communication.

  • Hello I need help on how to turn her on when is not in the mood and wants me to sex and get up because she had a stressful day. She also doesn’t love to be licked but I often like to give her head

    • Hi
      Have you tried the techniques I talk about in the article? I’d say that’s a good starting point for you. Perhaps also ask her if she likes the way you give her oral sex. It may be that you’re not doing it in a way that she likes! Equally, some women just don’t like it so you’ll have to accept it if that’s the case.

  • Hi….Its me Bisswass….M newly married and not well known about process I can please my wife….I get satisfaction before my Wife…Which makes me frustrated….am feeling myself as a poor guy coz of this reason…Is there any way so that I could please her as well as make her well sexually satisfied and she too get orgasm when I ejaculate….Plz reply meh…..

    • Hi Bisswass
      Congratulations on your marriage! Well, there are two things you can do I guess. One is to work on your sexual stamina, for which you can find lots of help around this website. Secondly, educate yourself about pleasing your partner sexually. I definitely recommend focusing on improving your oral sex technique. That article is full of great ideas you’ll be able to use to make her very happy.

  • Hi am experiencing hardship in dating i have more than one gal so am confused who 2 give much concentration but 4 real they all luv me but they all know that i have a lot of them

    • Hi Aladi
      Having open relationships can be tricky! If they are all aware of the situation, then I guess it’s up to you to decide who you like the most. And then whether you want to stay just with her or continue your open arrangement. But if you find it all too confusing, maybe open relationships aren’t for you.

  • I love giving oral sex to my beautiful wife, she does not like it, when I am down between her BEAUTIFUL LEGS, i enjoy the BEAUTIFUL smell of a BEAUTIFUL woman, she used to push my face between those BEAUTIFUL woman legs, she does not want me down there, i do not know what I am doing wrong or different, I MISS GOING DOWN ON MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE, i do not care that she does not give me oral, i loved it when I gave her orgsum after orgsum by oral sex, when she pushed my head away, my face would be covered With her BEAUTIFUL woman juices, i miss that !!!!

    • Hi Keith
      Thanks for your comment. I think probably you need to ask her openly why it is that she no longer likes it. Maybe not ask her in the moment she’s telling you not to do it, but when you’re both relaxed and cuddling in bed and just talking normally. Tell her you really enjoy it and miss it and see if she can tell you what it is that stopped her from enjoying it.

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