Reverse Kegels – My Step By Step Guide

Out of all the premature ejaculation techniques, reverse kegels seem to cause the most confusion – especially when learning which muscles to use.

Despite the initial difficulty, it’s worth sticking with it, as it’s a useful technique for keeping yourself calm during sex. And in my experience, it’s more effective than repeatedly trying to keep the point of no return at bay with your strongest kegel squeeze.

In this article, you’ll learn exactly how to do reverse kegels and why it’s important to practice them alongside normal kegels. I’ll also suggest how to add reverse kegels into the routine described in my complete guide to kegels (a free article, in case you’re wondering).

Why are reverse kegels difficult?

The physical ‘how to’ is the part that people struggle with the most. It’s not easy working out which muscles to target, and even harder to do the right thing with those muscles.

There are three reasons I think men have problems with this:

  • You haven’t done enough normal kegels, so you don’t understand the muscles involved.
  • The movement you need to do is a bit strange, which makes you doubt it’s right.
  • Knowing exactly when to do reverse kegels during sex is confusing in itself.

Many readers have left comments or emailed me in the years since first writing this article to say they aren’t sure if they’re doing it right. So I’ve since edited it to try and make it as clear as possible.

First learn normal kegels

The best way to identify the correct muscles is to first learn the normal version. Reverse kegels are targeting the same muscles, but in a more subtle way.

These aren’t muscles you normally have an awareness of, and it can take time to develop the ability to either squeeze or relax them.

So if you get the hang of normal ones, you’ll have a better chance of being sure you’re doing reverse kegels correctly.

Reverse kegels step by step

Step 1

Remember the classic kegel instructions about stopping yourself in the middle of peeing? This time, when you go for a pee try to gently force it out faster instead.

This is basically a reverse kegel of the key muscle – the Bulbocavernosus muscle – located at the base of the penis. You only need to do this once to get an idea for what it feels like. After that don’t try forcing out your pee any more and continue on to the next steps.

Step 2

Sit comfortably in a chair and relax for a few moments. Now gently try to simulate the muscle movement you would make if trying to do a poo or fart (don’t blame me for any accidents!)

This movement will be doing a reverse kegel of the Pubococcygeus muscle. Though it will also probably engage the Bulbocavernosus muscle as well.

Note: It’s unclear how important it is to be able to do a reverse kegel with both the front and back muscles. In my experience, the front one (Bulbocavernosus muscle) is more effective in controlling ejaculation.

However, it’s good to try to learn both as you may find that you need to focus on relaxing the entire area to develop any kind of control. Isolating them takes a lot of practice, so don’t worry if the whole area moves when practicing. Better control should develop naturally in time.

Step 3

Did you notice in both of these steps some movement in your stomach muscles, perhaps expanding or tensing? If not, do them again and you’ll probably notice some movement or tension.

This isn’t something to aim for when doing reverse kegels eventually, but it can help at the start to identify the correct movement.

Step 4

Now it’s time to add some breathing. Do the same steps again, but this time breathe in while doing them and allow your belly to expand. This is known as breathing from the diaphragm.

Most people breathe by expanding their chest. But you can also breathe by expanding your stomach instead. You might find that doing this helps you focus the movement on the BC muscle.

Step 5

Now you can put it all together. Do the simulated peeing and pooing motion, but also breathing out slowly from your belly, whilst keeping some light tension in the belly.

With the breathing and tensing, you should feel much more able to isolate the muscles and do a good reverse kegel. It does take practice though, so keep at it. You can try this for a few minutes a day until you get it right.

Step 6

Now for the really tricky part. Can you do reverse kegels without the help of breathing and tensing?

This can take a lot of practice, and even then you may never be able to do it without at least a little tension and stomach expansion. That’s fine, just try to reduce how much you rely on using the stomach to get the job done.

The key point here is that you need to be really relaxed. You need to mentally go inside your body and visualize the muscles relaxing and pushing out slightly.

Breathe slowly, deeply and relaxed while doing so, and try to focus on the area where the BC muscle is. Allow it to relax just by keeping your mind on it and trying to gently encourage it with your muscle control.

Step 7

Now’s the time for some real practice. While masturbating you can try to do 3 different things.

  1. Do normal kegels and see what effect it has on your sense of control.
  2. Switch to reverse kegels and see what happens to your physical arousal and control.
  3. Then try to just relax the whole area.

There’s no set way to do this, and it involves some experimenting and creativity from you. In my experience, it took a couple of weeks of playing around with the concept 3 or 4 times a week.

Eventually, I discovered that keeping relaxed was best. And when I felt tension creeping in, doing a reverse kegel could help restore the relaxation.

Step 8

If you have a partner you can eventually try reverse kegels during sex. In my experience, it’s best to do it when you’re on your back and she’s on top.

That way you have the best chance of relaxing and isolating the correct muscles. Again, some experimentation with positions might be needed before you find the right one to help you focus and relax.

Why are reverse kegels important?

This is an important point to remember: some men try to train very strong pelvic floor muscles because they read somewhere that it can stop them ejaculating.

Then they go overboard and try to hold the muscles as much as possible during sex. Either that or they think it gives them a better erection, so they continually pump the BC muscle during sex.

This is counterproductive though and encourages quicker ejaculation. Instead, normal kegel holds should only be done at the very last moment to try to stop yourself ejaculating. Or in the beginning to help yourself get a good erection.

If you’re trying to last longer, then at all other times during sex you should keep the PC and BC muscles relaxed. And doing reverse kegels is one way to accomplish this for three reasons:

  • By training reverse kegels along with normal ones, you develop balance and control of the pelvic floor muscles
  • If you aren’t able to keep relaxed during sex, then actively doing the motion of reverse kegels can help to achieve the relaxed pelvic floor you need to be able to last longer
  • If you train it to a high level, you may be able to do reverse kegels so well that you can stop yourself ejaculating. You can do this before the point of no return and it’s usually more successful than waiting until the point when you need to do normal kegels.

So in some ways, you’re giving yourself two opposite weapons in the battle. You can do reverse kegels and keep relaxed as much as possible. Then if it all fails, switch to a normal kegel squeeze just before the moment of no return.

And finally, doing reverse kegels can help stop you from overtraining and creating an imbalance in your pelvic floor. So work on balance and control, not just strength.

A reverse kegel routine

Here are some ways to incoporate reverse kegels into a training regime with the normal version:

Plan A

You can do each normal kegel routine each day as described. Then at the end spend 2 or 3 minutes practicing reverse kegels.

So you could do this:

  • Sit or lie down and relax for a minute.
  • Breathe in for the count of 4 seconds and do a reverse kegel. Either with or without tension and belly breathing. Do whichever you can manage.
  • Stop, relax and breathe out for 4 seconds.
  • Repeat 9 more times, to make 10 sets.
  • Do the same again, but this time breathing in for 6 seconds. Breathing out normally at the end of each 6 seconds.
  • Now try and do the reverse kegel 10 times with normal breathing. See how much harder it is when you’re breathing out?
  • Finally, hold the relaxed pushing out feeling for 30 seconds or as long as you can.

This is only a basic example routine, and you can add more sets and times to it as you get better at it.

Plan B

This time instead of doing the reverse kegels after the normal ones, you can do them alternately. Again it’s up to you to decide how to mix the sets, and it doesn’t really matter how you do it. Just don’t overdo it by doing it too many strong kegels.

Plan C

The final way is to do the normal kegal routine on one day, and the reverse routine either at a separate time the same day, or even the next day.

There’s no scientific evidence suggesting one way is better than another, so in my opinion you should aim for variety. Muscles adapt to training quickly, so the more you surprise them, the better the results.

Still having trouble identifying the right muscles?

Many readers have left comments saying they can’t identify the right muscle. The best way really is to focus on the muscle you need to use to make yourself pee faster.

Another way is to stand up when you have an erection. If you do a normal kegel, you should notice your penis rises. If you then do a reverse kegel, you should notice it drops downwards.

Your thoughts

Have you tried kegels? Feel free to share your experience and ideas, or ask questions below.

Even if some time has passed since the last comment, I never close comments on this site, so you will get a response.

377 thoughts on “Reverse Kegels – My Step By Step Guide”

  1. I have been trying to get my head round kegels for some weeks, and your article is the most helpful I have found so far. Thank you for your clear explanation.

  2. Hi, I really appreciate this article. I have a question about the timing. When I have sex should I do reverse kegels right from the second we start, or only if I feel I’m getting very aroused? thanks

    1. Hi there
      I think it’s a personal choice. Personally, I don’t do it until I feel like I’m getting very aroused. Until then, I just focus on my breathing, overall body sensations and try to stay relaxed generally and enjoy the sex without worrying too much about kegels etc. But if you jump straight to higher arousal levels early on, then perhaps it’s good to call upon the technique sooner.
      I think really you just have to play with the concept a bit and find out what works best for you.

  3. Hi Ethan, im a bit confused. While masturbating, should I be doing reverse kegels? Will that help lengthen my sessions? Or should the rkegel be done when im about to orgasm?

    1. Hi Adam

      Let me try to put it simply and see if that helps:-)

      1. when masturbating don’t do any kegels – just try to relax that whole area naturally.
      2. If you get too aroused, you can experiment with a reverse kegel to see if it helps reduce your arousal – it’s kind of like ‘forced relaxation’ when relaxation on its own start failing.
      3. If you get super aroused and feel close to cumming, do a normal strong kegel hold to stop it.
      4. Rest and then carry on again.

  4. Hi Ethan,
    I never really had a big problem with PE until recently, I wouldn’t necessarily last long enough but a good 5 minutes I would say. This is all with no condom btw, anyway, just recently i haven’t been able to last for over a minute and it is really worrying me. I feel like i haven’t been satisfied with my initial duration of 5 mins or so which got me feeling stressed and therefore lead to me not even lasting for a minute which is terrifying. i started doing the kegels & reverse kegels exercise just recently, but i feel like the kegels might have a negative effect on me because that contraction of the muscle sometimes just happens naturally during sex? Do you have any advice on how i can get back to my natural self because i find it hard to believe that you can all of a sudden develop severe PE when you it wasn’t that bad. And also any advice on the kegels, should i stop doing the kegel exercise and just work on the reverse kegels from now on?
    Thank you in advance.


    1. Hi Marc
      I understand your worries completely. Actually, there are two main forms of PE – lifelong and acquired, so it sounds like you have the latter. Why it happened now is impossible for me to say, and it could be for various reasons. But as you say, perhaps anxiety about your lasting time in general got you thinking about it, and then worrying, which in turn has led to quicker ejaculation. Perhaps if you’re feeling tense in bed thinking about it, that’s what’s making you ejaculate quicker.
      My advice is to focus on getting the thought out of your head when you’re having sex, relaxing both your body and mind, and turning your attention to how your body feels all over, and put yourself into the moment. Don’t get stuck in your thinking process while having sex.
      To help you do that, you can do some slow breathing exercises before and during sex, spend more time on reverse kegels than kegels and don’t do any strong kegel holds during sex if you can avoid it.
      And on a general level, maybe introduce some stress relief activity to your daily life – take up yoga, meditation, exercises or anything that helps you unwind. It can make a big difference to your body and mind so when it comes to sex, you should also be a little more relaxed.
      But again, I’d say the main thing is to avoid thinking about time at all before or during sex. Remember that it’s not all about penetrations and orgasms – enjoy more foreplay, manual and oral and enjoy the intimacy with your partner as much as possible. Even if you ejaculate quickly, forget about it and just move on to give your partner more attention in other ways like oral.

  5. Hi thanks for the artcile
    I am experiencing some wierd things u could maybe help me understand
    so basicly after doing the kegels and the reverse one’s for a while i got a good control of my ejaculation
    and then one day while masturbating i got relaxed and contract an area that i couldnt feel before and that get me insta cum its a wierd feeling i can fell the orgasm through my legs not like a normal orgasm more like a prostat orgasm
    by doing this i can cum in 20 sec ez xD
    i didnt find anything talking about this on the internet

    1. Hi Zak
      I think…though I’m not 100% certain…that I know what you mean. Does it give you a strange all-body sensation? Almost like a vibration, centered in the legs, but also in the upper body to an extent?

        1. Hi Zak
          That sounds familiar – almost like a sensation you can just turn on and off at will, and quite strange too. It’s interesting to play with the feeling and see where it can take you!

  6. hi ethan, thank you for the clear explanation. I read several articles about this before yours but none explained it so well. I had some positive results with kegels and can sometimes block my ejaculation on a good day. but the idea of relaxing with reverse movements sounds like it could be even better…if i ever get it right lol

    1. Hi Lloyd
      Thanks for that! It’s always nice to know my articles are appreciated:-)
      Yes, reverse kegels – or the concept of just staying relaxed – can be very effective if you get it right. It’s not easy, but definitely worth keeping practicing.

  7. Hi,
    Thanks for great article. Had a question about using reverse kegel – during the stop-start practice should I try to relax pelvic floor? If I touch with finger pelvic floor area during the practice I can feel tight, hard muscles(?). Should it be relaxed instead like in a normal time?

    1. Hi A
      You’re welcome, it’s always good to hear readers like the articles!
      Yes, try to keep the pelvic floor muscles as relaxed as possible when doing the stop-start. If you get close to the point of no return, you can try to do a strong contraction to hold back, but at all other times, relaxation is the key.
      You may be feeling tightness as a natural part of becoming aroused, or having involuntary contractions as the process of ejaculation starts. I wouldn’t worry about it too much – just focus on relaxation and don’t get caught up on the exact levels of tightness you can feel. The more you focus on them, the more you’ll worry if a muscle you’re touching is too tight or not.

  8. my pelvic muscle are very tight… may be its due to regular long drive.. so that i got frequent urination unable to empty my bladder i feel something like cramping sensation below to my penies.. SO MY DOUBT WHILE DOING THIS EXERCISE SHALL I USE ANY MUSCLE RELAXANT GEL OR SPRAY (volini} IN PELVIS MUSCLE AREA???

    1. Hi Dass
      To be honest, I’m not really qualified to advise you on whether you should use muscle relaxants or not in your situation. My feeling would be that you should mention this to your doctor if you can. If you’re having issues with bladder control, they can perhaps check you over for any physical cause. It might be that they can provide a better solution than doing kegels.

  9. I feel as if when using the muscle to force out urine faster, the muscle that also pushes a fart out is used. Can’t seem to isolate them each seperately. Is that normal? Finding it quite difficult to isolate them both..

    1. Hi Aj
      I know it’s very difficult to isolate them, and really that’s understandable since the muscles of the pelvic floor are all connected. So yes, it’s normal to feel both movements as you describe, especially when you start practicing. I also think it’s fine to learn to relax the whole area, so there’s no need to worry if you just can’t seem to isolate them. As long as the BC muscle is being relaxed when you do reverse kegels, it’s ok if the other muscles also relax.

  10. I just can’t seem to get the hang of it. So if I’m right in thinking, it’s not doing a crap kind of feeling that’s important, it’s pushing out pee, right? But when I do reverse kegels I should relax but not push out? what if I’m in bed and I try to do the pee motion, but obviously not do it – will that help?

    1. Hi Ronny
      I know, it’s a confusing movement to understand. You’re first description is totally right, so that’s a good sign!
      You can either try to relax the pelvic floor muscles, or give a gentle push to help you identify the muscles first, and then relax them. You can do the pee motion if you feel it will help, but just do it briefly and lightly, before then focusing on relaxation again.

  11. I’ve been going kegels and reverse kegels for a couple months, and am seeing some progress, plus I can get much harder erections than before which is cool. But should I do the start and stop technique also or just kegels until I feel I have complete control? Great article btw

    1. Hi Terence
      I think definitely do the start and stop technique along with the kegels. You can try to stay relaxed and do reverse kegels if needed when you’re on the start bit, and just as you get to the stop point, do a strong kegel squeeze to practice holding back.

  12. Thanks for the great article and clear explanation! I’ve read a few reverse kegel articles, but this is the best so far.

  13. Hi I have a question if the kegels are going to help me I have problem with PE when I was a kid I tried to mas. Alot and ejac. Fast as possible so idk wht to do when I do normal kegels it actualy becomes worst and I get much more tension and exitement and I cum faster what should I do should I practice kegels or edge or both.

    1. Hi nick
      Unfortunately you’ve probably read one of the millions of articles on the internet talking about kegels, but the person who wrote it has no idea and is just repeating articles they’ve also read!
      Doing normal kegels all the time is likely to make you ejaculate quicker, because you’re basically pumping the same muscles used for ejaculation. So the idea is to keep them relaxed as much as possible, either by not doing any kegels and just trying to keep your pelvic floor relaxed, or by doing reverse kegels.
      At the end of the day, the experts are still not quite sure how kegels should be best used, so my advice is to avoid strong kegels and try to keep your whole body as relaxed as possible.
      And yes, edging is an effective technique to practice.

    2. Its true that kegels will make you cum if you do them all the time. Ethan is right. Relax and let your body stay relaxed when you have sex.

  14. Great post, I m glad i found it now that is still recent. I guess I need to practice some reverse kegel, but I prefer asking cause i m not sure.
    I suffer of soft erections , i get a kind of good erection just after manipulating the penis cause it s Like shriveled, dried and turtled in. I m always anxious and nervous…. And i Hardly manage to poo when i need, and i have to milk my bulbocavernous part under my testicles to pull out all the per left.
    This feeling of shrunk faccid penis brought me to always touch my penis till to masturbate to bring a bit of life, a bit of blood to my penis that in This way can expand even il not fully.
    So i m masturbating and ejaculating At last 3 times per day every day, no exceptions since long time.
    The shrunk faccid state is not permanent. Some days in a row happens my faccid penis hang low and well, is much fuller and i ha e rock erection easily and for long with minimal refractory period. I also experience in those happy days spontaneous erections and morning woods as when i was a teenager, now i m 34.
    Well, i never understood why that problem diseappear for few days and then come back for whole weeks. I recently noticed that when i m desperatly trying to poo after failing for several days and pulling my unus off as much as i can, my penis get fuller, hangs low and large as i ricognize it to be my normal faccid penis. Sometimes it remains Like that for days and i get great erections since, Sometimes no, but it s already a positive thing in a bad condition.
    Do you think i should just do reverse kegel…. or also normal kegel?
    If my understanding is correct, my pelvic floor is complete tensed, so i should avoid normal kegel.
    Any advice?
    Think you

    1. Hi Massimo
      I’m glad you liked the post. To be honest, I’m not sure I completely understand the details of your situation. And so if I don’t totally understand, I feel it would be wrong to give you advice.
      Having said that, if you think you have a tense pelvic floor and it’s causing you serious problems, discomfort, anxiety etc, then really the best thing to do is to speak to a doctor and/or physiotherapist. They can give you a proper examination and tell you the right exercises, if any are needed.
      Now, if you don’t feel comfortable going to see someone about this, then you have to do what you think is right. If you feel you have a tense pelvic floor, then I would work on your overall anxiety first. Perhaps by tackling the psychological anxiety through self-help, and maybe doing things like yogs, stretching, tai-chi, meditatation or anything which can help you relax, you might find it helps.
      You could try doing reverse kegels, but if you have problems with your pelvic floor, getting them right can be quite tricky. So my advice is to take an overall approach to mental and physical relaxation for a few weeks first and see if that helps.

  15. Hi Ethan,
    I’ve been experimenting recently with the reverse kegels. During masturbation I’ve feel the ejaculation building and do a reverse kegel to calm down while still stroking. I get to ejaculation and then come but it kind of dribbles out is less intense and happens over a long period time. Are reverse kegels used similarly to kegels in the way that you have to stop and do the reverse kegel or is there something else I’m missing?

    1. Hi Issac
      I see what you mean. I think you’re just missing one point here – if you’re doing a reverse kegel and continuing to ejaculate, even slowly, then it means you missed the point when you should have either stopped stroking and rest for a while, or switch to a stronger normal kegel hold to stop yourself from ejaculating.
      Ultimately, if you do reverse kegels and continue stroking, at some point you will ejaculate – you can’t hold back forever. So you still need to be aware of the point of no return and stop just before you get there.
      Does that answer your question?

  16. Hi Ethan,

    Thank you for that wonderful article.

    I am one of those who overdid kegels in a wrong way (used to contract my pelvic floor muscles the hardest, longest I could, everyday). I never practiced reverse kegels.

    After having stopped doing them altogether for 5+ months, I am still having trouble contracting my pelvic floor muscles. They feel very weak when contracted, and have trouble holding the contraction. The quality of my erections decreased.

    What do you recommend in this case, knowing that I would really love to do normal kegels correctly in the future? Sorry if that have been asked I couldn’t find something related on the website.
    Thank you in advance,

    1. Hi Peter
      I’m glad you liked the article, thanks for saying!
      Sorry to hear about the problem you’ve had with kegels. You’re definitely not alone – several guys have written to me saying they’ve had problems after not finding advice about over-doing it on other websites.
      To be totally honest, I’m still not entirely sure what the best thing is to do in cases like yours. Since I’m not a doctor, there’s a limit to the advice I can give, and I’m kind of left to give my opinion based on what I’ve read elsewhere and found through my own practice.
      So really, I think perhaps the best thing – if you can face it – is to speak to your doctor and get their advice, and perhaps see a physical therapist. They might be able to give you exercises to untighten the pelvic floor and strengthen it in the right way.
      I actually recently read an interesting article about whether you should do kegels or not on a Have a read, as it might help you understand your situation a bit better.

  17. Hi Ethan,

    Not sure if you are still answering questions here but thought I would leave a question and hope for the best I’ve been doing Kegels for a while now and noticed that I can contract the muscles pretty firmly and when I do I feel a tightening in the shaft and a swelling in the head of the penis Other times I have tried to concentrate on only contraction of the pevic floor (PB) muscles without the tension in the shaft and swelling of the penis head. My question is one method of contracting better then the other or is their not real benefit of one over the other. Any thoughts on the matter would be appreciated.


    1. Hi Mike
      Yes, I always answer all comments on my articles, not matter how old! I’m a big believer in helping guys as much as possible, even if there’s a long gap in between comments (just so any future readers know too!)

      When you feel the swelling, that means you’re doing a normal kegel correctly. So that’s the type of kegel to do either to help yourself get a stronger erection when needed, or to do a very tight squeeze if you feel you’re on the verge of ejaculating.

      I don’t see any reason to squeeze the other muscles unless helping with other problems such as incontinence.

      However, if you can do the reverse and relax all, or any, of the pelvic floor muscles, it might help you keep your arousal level down during sex. So in some ways it’s fine to learn to isolate the different muscles when practicing kegels, but during sex, try to keep all of them nice and relaxed…unless you need to call into action that tight squeeze.

      Hope that helps

  18. nice article Ethan, thank you for the clear description. I’ve tried for a few weeks now to do reverse kegels, but wasn’t sure if i was doing them right or not. But it’s defo clearer after reading this, and it looks like i was on the right lines. thanks again.

    1. Hi Hector
      Thanks, I’m glad you like the article and that it’s helped you work out if you were doing the kegels correctly or not. Good luck with them!

  19. So, I have an issue where my kegels and reverse kegels feel like they’re targeting the same muscle. I’m not sure if I’m doing the kegel or the reverse kegel wrong ? is there a surefire way that I know I’m targeting the right muscle? I’ve been doing kegels for about 1 1/2 weeks now, and it seems to of strengthened my muscles on the pelvic floor so I feel like I’m doing it right? The whole peeing thing didn’t really help haha, thanks for the article!

  20. For doing reverse kegels, could one start with a mild kegel of 1-2 seconds and the relax the pelvic floor muscles to get the feeling of peeing (or letting go) for 10 seconds and then repeat doing reps of 10.
    This would make the exercises understandable and men would have a method of how to do reverse kegels.

    1. Hi there
      Yes, that does make sense to me too. I’ve been meaning to update this article with some more ideas about working out exactly what to do based on a number of comments from guys struggling to understand them. And your idea is one I will be talking about.

  21. Hey, here is the question :
    1. when doing reverse kegel should i do Front RK or Back RK ? and whats different ?
    2. While im doing reverse kegel, is it normal if my lower abs expanding(not tensing), have difficult breathing cause that lower abs contracting, and it* starting to erect slowly ? (What is the perfect/right condition)
    3. How does it feel when i hit the right muscle(refer to question 1 too)?

    1. Hi Xavien
      Let’s see if I can help:
      1. The front version, which is the one which most impacts on the penis. But to be honest, if you can get the area to relax generally, it’s not so important which version you think you’re doing!
      2. Yes, that can happen.
      3. Well, it feels like a relaxing or dropping down of the area. The best trick is perhaps to stand up with an erection and then do a reverse kegel. If you notice the penis start to lose its angle, strength or rigidity a little, you’re probably doing it right!

  22. Can u make the Wrong and Right section ? (reverse kegel). Because its too confusing
    Like this =
    Right :
    -Your penis head feel weird while doing this
    Wrong :
    -if u re tense ur abs

    Your article is good but its not give a specific detail what it feels like if u get the right muscle. That “right” and “wrong” is very important. THX

    1. Hi Xavien
      I do have it in mind to update this article soon with some more pointers for understanding how to do it correctly, and I’ll see if I can incorporate your ideas.

  23. I didn’t seem to have any problems with premature ejaculations nor erectile dysfuntion until last year. It has been exactly one year the nightmar started. As I was having intercourse with my wife I noticed my penis gave up but I thought it was just a bad day. Hell, I have been having erection problems ever since as well as premature ejaculations. I have been practicing regular Kegels but now that I found this page I am also going to try reverse kegels too. I have better my erections with regular kegels but not to the point where I can have a normal sex life. This situation has been causing issues in my marriage. I suggest you all to use “The Sensual Tea”. It is believed to be one of the only natural treatments fo help erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculations, both in one. It is also very affordable and you can find it in Europe as well as in America; cheers.

  24. Hi Ethan ,

    Please help me .

    Each time i get a sexual urge i also get a desire to urinate .

    i am a 55 yr old otherwise healthy male , married , professional , happy and two adult kids .

    Looking back , i have had this problem for over 7 years but it got progressively worse,because the time between the erection and wanting to pee moved from i hr to 2minutes .

    i have been to 3 urologists ; i took medication and tests for all kinds of infection, cancer, growth, blockage etc …..and even meds for that part of my brain that controlled the process. Tablets didnt work and all the tests say that i am okay .

    The last doctor advised that i do kegel exercises which made my erection stronger but the problem persisted … ie the urge to urinate . A friend has asked me to do reversed kegels and that is how i found your site .

    i would surely try it but would this benefit me ? what will ?

    i cherish your reply

    1. Hi Allan
      To be honest. I think reverse kegels might have the opposite effect and make things worse, so I would avoid them. I wish I could think of something that would be help, but I don’t know! I think if the doctor told you to do kegels, that’s probably the best advice. However, maybe you could also do a small amount of reverse kegels to keep a balance in the pelvic muscles. But really, it’s normal kegels that can stop the feeling of urination more than reverse.

  25. Hi i have a question i am doing reverse kegels and my right testicle rises and scrotum sort of it expands is that ok??

    1. Hi Benjur
      To ho honest, I would expect that to happen more with a normal kegel hold. A reverse kegel would normally make the area relax and drop, not expand. Is it a very visible effect though, as in, can you control it? Or is there just small small movement when you’re doing the kegels?

  26. Should I push out really strong? My lower abs were sore the next day but I don’t know if I actually stretched the pelvic floor…

    1. Hi there
      Definitely not. If you’re pushing that strongly, you’re not doing it right at all. It’s a subtle movement, and not one which requires continuous physical exertion. The pushing is a method to identify the muscles, not a constant technique to develop them.

  27. Hi Ethan,

    It all started a few years ago( almost 5 years ago). I was good on bed, I never used to last for hours but I was pretty good. I never felt I had to come when my girl gave me oral and I remember having sex for more than half an hour.

    Then I was looking at how to perform better sexually, I came across this thing called Kegels. I started doing them and I realized they made my erections stronger and I could go longer and multiple times. I was so impressed, I started doing all the time. While driving, at work during meetings. I was pulling my penis in unconsciously because I was so used to doing Kegels.

    Not sure when it started to get worse, but I wouldn’t last that long anymore. I realized I am never relaxed during sex or masturbation. I am always squeezing the hell out of my penis. I try so hard not to cum, I squeeze even harder. I end up coming anyway. A Lot of times, I felt like I had to come few seconds after started having sex. I came a couple of times with a blow job. It’s terrible.

    When I workout, doing squats or deadlifts, I feel like my dick is always sore. My prostrate area is sore.

    Squeezing in my PC muscles, I think also lead to few other problems. I now have to urinate a lot more times than I used to with lesser quantity. My urine stream is weaker and sometimes I urinate very little. I feel like I have less control.

    Please help me Ethan. I would owe you my life. This made my life terrible.

    Thank you,

    1. Hi Josh
      Sorry to hear you’ve had such a big problem due to the kegels. I think you’re possibly in the right place, looking at doing reverse kegels. The first thing I would say is totally stop doing any normal kegels. You also mentioned that during sex you now squeeze even harder to try to hold back. You need to stop that too, because squeezing a normal kegel during sex all the time can make you come quicker. It’s only supposed to be used right before the point of no return.
      So, perhaps doing reverse kegels instead will help. You might find it difficult at first, having done so many normal kegels. So I’d also suggest doing other more general relaxation exercises – anything you think you can stick with. Yoga, meditation, gentle stretching, breathing exercises. Anything you can think of to bring your body and mind’s tension down.
      I also think perhaps it’s worth talking to a urologist. If you’re having problems with urination because of this, it might be worth getting a professional opinion. I know that might sound awkward, but there’s no harm in getting some advice.
      I hope that helps

  28. Hi!
    I’ve recently started doing Kegels on a regular basis and I was wondering if it is ok to do them with an erection. I can feel my PC muscle pushing out much better when I am doing reverse kegels like that. Is it normal that the head of the penis is fully pumped by doing reverse kegels?
    And when having sex should I do reverse Kegls while thrusting or stay in “relax” mode.
    Thank you!

    1. Hi Pauli
      Yes, you can do kegels with an erection if you choose. Just go easy and don’t do too many, too hard and too often. I don’t notice the head pumping when I do reverse kegels personally. And when having sex, I’d try to stat relaxed – if you get too aroused, try reverse kegels to reduce the arousal, and if you get to the point of no return, do normal kegels just before as a last resort.
      I hope that helps!

  29. Hey Ethan
    I have been doing reverse kegels and kegels for about three weeks now.
    I’m still not sure Iøm doing the reverse kegels correctly – I’m for example still flexing my abs when I do it, and I can’t help it. I’m also a little unsure about how to do it by following your steps.
    I have tried, but I actually ended up only trying to pee real hard. That would say the difference between me doing a kegel and me doing a reverse kegel is, that I do the “stop-peeing” motion when I do kegels and then try to pee real hard doing a reverse kegel.
    Am I doing the reverse kegels correctly then?

    Also; Do I have to breathe in or out doing reverse kegels or does it really matter?


    1. Hi Dan
      I know it’s quite tricky getting reverse kegels right – sorry if my instructions haven’t helped much. Technically, what you describe is correct. However, the idea is to be able to relax those muscles without pushing any other muscles or feeling like you need to pee. And that can take time to develop. My advice would be to focus on relaxing the whole area for now rather than pushing or peeing. If you do a normal kegel, then look at what you need to make that kegel go away as quickly and fully as possible – that’s another way of working out what the reverse kegel does – literally reversing the kegel you were previously doing.

  30. Hello greetings from Singapore. I’ve been practicing Kegel and Reverse Kegel for a couple days now. I am still not quite sure but I am starting to feel the difference between front and back muscles. I feel the front one by flexing my lower abs, like when i’m trying to get my pee out faster, the back one when i am trying to fart to poo. Is it right?

    Also I also want to ask, if the point of reverse kegels is relaxation, make the PC, BC, IC muscles relax. Why do I feel that whenever I practice reverse kegel (flexing my abs) I do not feel relaxed, in fact I could not breathe too deep. Am i doing something wrong here?

    Would love to see your respond, Ethan.

    1. Hi Ivan
      Your first description sounds right to me, yes.
      I think your second question tells me you’re flexing your muscles when you shouldn’t. When learning where the muscles are, it’s helpful to flex parts of the stomach. But, reverse kegels are really done without any stomach tensing. You should be able to just mentally direct those muscles to relax. That’s why it takes some practice, as at first you won’t feel like anything is happening. So until you do, it’s sometimes helpful to give yourself some help by flexing the stomach.

  31. HI,
    I’ve always had this habit of clenching my pc muscles while Masturbating and this leads to a burning sensation or soreness in the pc muscle and anus area after ejaculation. Is there a remedy for this? Also, it hurts if I try to gain an Erection after ejaculation. Usually, it takes me more than a day’s rest to gain an Erection without any pain. Please help!

    1. Hi Ben
      I think you need to find a way to stop clenching. You can try to do reverse kegels, but also it might help just to lie on your back, and really focus hard on keeping that area relaxed. Even if you can’t quite do reverse kegels, you should with some practice be able to keep the muscles relaxed.

  32. Hi!
    I’ve been doing normal Kegels for a month and just started with reverse Kegels. With normal ones I can feel the muscle clearly contracting if I put my hand around the muscle but with the reverse Kegels my muscle barely moves. Is that normal? Should I feel the muscle expanding with the same intensity as when it’s contracting doing normal ones?
    Many thanks!

    1. Hi Charles
      That’s a very good question. The answer, as far as I’m aware, is no. For me, the reverse kegel move is much more subtle than the normal kegel. You might have a better chance of telling if there’s something happening if you stand up and look at your erect penis. You should be able to make it move up with a normal kegel. And if you do a reverse, you should (though it might take a little while) see if slowly relax.

  33. Is it normal for it to be very hard to do a rk during stimulation because my pelvic area is very tense and when I try my RK it doesn’t relax

    1. Hi Sam
      Thanks for your comment. Unfortunately, yes, it is quite tricky to do when in the throws of passion. That’s why I recommend either being on your back, or in the spoons position. In my experience you have a much better chance of keeping the pelvic area relaxed in those positions. If you’re on top, or on your knees on the bed, it’s really hard because you have to tense so many muscles to stay in position. It’s not so bad if you’re standing on the floor and having sex from behind, but again trickier than when you can release the muscle tension like in the first two positions.
      I hope that helps

  34. I’ve been doing 30sec normal kegals and then immediately switching to 30sec reverse kegals. I do that back to back 10 times and it works great for me! I can probably do it longer. Tonight I may try 15min session. The most difficult part for me is my breathing technique during the reverse kegal. I tend to hold my breath which isn’t good.

    Normal kegals plus reverse kegals and then throw in some proper breathing techniques you should be able to go hard for at least 15-30min.

    Good luck!

    1. Hi Mousegutz
      Thanks for your comment. It’s great that you’ve had such success with the kegels. Don’t overdo it though – I think 15 mins of constant kegels is a lot!

  35. On a daily basis how often should I practice reverse kegals? How long does it take to start noticing the benefits. My aim is stop ejaculation during sex.

    1. Hi Tom
      Thanks for your comment. Personally I think they can be practiced most days, as they are less likely to cause tension like normal kegels can. However, I still think it’s best to have a couple days a week without doing kegels at all, just to give the muscles a chance to relax. In terms of how long it takes, that’s a difficult question to answer as everyone progresses at a different rate. However, within a few weeks you should start to see a difference. And within a couple of months you should hopefully find that you get better at relaxing the area and see good results.

  36. I noticed some time back that a rk did lower my feeling of ej but hadnt figured out a way to practice it. Did you at one point struggle with pe? If so how were your results now without a condom?

    1. Hi there
      It does take some time to really perfect reverse kegels! That’s totally normal to be honest. Yes, I struggled for many years with PE. You can have a read of the article in which I talk about my experience with premature ejaculation if you want to know more about what I did to deal with it.
      Nowadays I have regular sex without a condom so am used to it. But yes, it’s still harder to last as long as I would do with a condom.

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