Reverse Kegels – 8 Steps To Doing Them Correctly

Reverse kegels are a relatively new concept, and one which seems to cause as much confusion as quantum physics. Despite the mystery though, reverse kegels are a useful technique you can use to last longer during sex.

And in my experience, it’s more effective than relying on doing a super human strength normal kegel hold at the critical point of no return. Let’s face it – there’s a reason it’s called the point of no return.

In this article, you’ll learn exactly how to do reverse kegels and why it’s important to practice them alongside normal kegels.

I’ll also suggest how to add reverse kegels into the routine described in my complete guide to kegels.

How to do reverse kegels

The physical ‘how to’ is the part that guys struggle with the most. It’s not easy working out which muscles to target, and even harder to do the right thing with those muscles.

There are four reasons I think guys have problems with this:

  • Maybe you haven’t done enough normal kegels, which are easier, and so you don’t understand the muscles involved.
  • The movement you need to do is a bit weird, so you may be unsure if it’s right or not.
  • Even when you do them, you might question how they can help you last longer.
  • The internet doesn’t have much good or reliable information on the topic.

Many readers have left comments or emailed me in the years since first writing it to say they aren’t sure if they are doing it right. So I’ve since edited this article to try and make it as clear as possible.

I hope you find it helpful!

First of all learn normal kegels

The best way to identify the correct muscles is to first learn how to do normal kegels. Reverse kegels are targeting the same muscles, but in a much more subtle way.

These aren’t muscles you normally have an awareness of, and it can take time to develop the ability to either squeeze or relax them. It’s much easier to develop the first stages of control through doing normal kegels.

So if you get the hang of normal ones, you’ll have a much better chance of being sure you’re doing reverse kegels correctly.

You may also find it helpful to look at my detailed explanation of the main muscles used, the Bulbocavernosus muscle and Pubococcygeus muscle.

Step by step guide to doing reverse kegels

Step 1

Remember the classic kegel instructions about stopping yourself in the middle of peeing? This time, when you go for a pee try to gently force it out faster instead.

This is basically a reverse kegel of the key muscle – the Bulbocavernosus muscle – located at the base of the penis. You only need to do this once to get an idea for what it feels like. After that don’t try forcing out your pee any more and continue on to the next steps.

Step 2

Sit comfortably in a chair and relax for a few moments. Now gently try to simulate the muscle movement you would make if trying to do a poo or fart.

Obviously, don’t actually do either of those though!

This movement will be doing a reverse kegel of the Pubococcygeus muscle. Though it will also probably engage the Bulbocavernosus muscle as well.

Note: It’s unclear how important it is to be able to do a reverse kegel with both the front and back muscles. In my experience, the front one (Bulbocavernosus muscle) is more effective in controlling ejaculation.

However, it’s good to try to learn both as you may find that you need to focus on relaxing the entire area to develop any kind of control. Isolating them takes a lot of practice, so for now don’t worry if the whole area moves when practicing. Better control should develop naturally in time.

Step 3

Did you notice in both of these steps some movement in your stomach muscles, perhaps expanding or tensing? If not, do them again and you’ll probably notice some movement or tension.

This isn’t something to aim for when doing reverse kegels eventually, but it can help at the start to identify the correct movement.

Step 4

Now it’s time to add some breathing. Do the same steps again, but this time breathe in while doing them and allow your belly to expand. This is known as breathing from the diaphragm.

Most people breathe by expanding their chest. But you can also breathe by expanding your stomach instead. You might find that doing this helps you focus the movement on the BC muscle.

Step 5

Now you can put it all together. Do the simulated peeing and pooing motion, but also breathing out slowly from your belly, whilst keeping some light tension in the belly.

With the breathing and tensing, you should feel much more able to isolate the muscles and do a good reverse kegel. It does take practice though, so keep at it. You can try this for a few minutes a day until you get it right.

Step 6

Now for the really tricky part. Can you do reverse kegels without the help of breathing and tensing?

This can take a lot of practice, and even then you may never be able to do it without at least a little tension and stomach expansion. That’s fine, just try to reduce how much you rely on using the stomach to get the job done.

The key point here is that you need to be really relaxed. You need to mentally go inside your body and visualize the muscles relaxing and pushing out slightly.

Breathe slowly, deeply and relaxed while doing so, and try to focus on the area where the BC muscle is. Allow it to relax just by keeping your mind on it and trying to gently encourage it with your muscle control.

Step 7

Now’s the time for some real practice. While masturbating you can try to do 3 different things.

  1. Do normal kegels and see what effect it has on your sense of control.
  2. Switch to reverse kegels and see what happens to your physical arousal and control.
  3. Then try to just relax the whole area.

There’s no set way to do this, and it involves some experimenting and creativity from you. In my experience, it took a couple of weeks of playing around with the concept 3 or 4 times a week.

Eventually I discovered that keeping relaxed was best. And when I felt tension creeping in, doing a reverse kegel could help restore the relaxation.

Step 8

If you have a partner you can eventually try reverse kegels during sex. In my experience, it’s best to do it when you’re on your back and she’s on top.

That way you have the best chance of relaxing and isolating the correct muscles. Again, some experimentation with positions might be needed before you find the right one to help you focus and relax.

Why are reverse kegels important?

This is the most important point you might ever learn about kegels: guys often train a very strong PC or BC muscle because they read somewhere that it can stop them ejaculating.

Then they go overboard and try to hold the muscles as much as possible during sex. Either that or they think it gives them a better erection, so they continually pump the BC muscle during sex.

This is unfortunately counter-productive though and encourages quicker ejaculation.

Instead, normal kegel holds should only be done at the very last moment to try to stop yourself ejaculating. Or in the beginning to help yourself get a good erection.

If you’re trying to last longer, then at all other times during sex you should keep the PC and BC muscles relaxed.

And doing reverse kegels is one way to accomplish this for three reasons:

  • By training reverse kegels along with normal ones, you develop balance and control of the pelvic floor muscles.
  • If you aren’t able to keep relaxed during sex, then actively doing the motion of reverse kegels can help to achieve the relaxed pelvic floor you need to be able to last longer.
  • If you train it to a high level, you may be able to do reverse kegels so well that you can stop yourself ejaculating. You can do this before the point of no return and it’s usually more successful than waiting until the point when you need to do normal kegels.

So in some ways you’re giving yourself two opposite weapons in the battle. You can do reverse kegels and keep relaxed as much as possible. Then if it all fails, switch to a normal kegel squeeze just before the moment of no return.

And finally, doing reverse kegels can help stop you from overtraining and creating an imbalance in your pelvic floor. To reap all the benefits of kegels, you must work on balance and control, not pure strength.

A reverse kegel routine

This is a common request made by guys, and one which has no definitive answer. As with kegels, nobody has ever claimed to be the world authority on a precise routine. So you’re left to use common sense or follow someone else’s routine.

In the previous article that I mentioned earlier I described a 4 week basic kegels routine. I recommend reading that and then try these plans:

Plan A

You can do each normal kegel routine each day as described. Then at the end spend 2 or 3 minutes practicing reverse kegels.

So you could for example do this:

  • Sit or lie down and relax for a minute.
  • Take a deep breath.
  • Breathe in for the count of 4 seconds and do a reverse kegel. Either with or without tension and belly breathing. Do whichever you can manage.
  • Stop, relax and breathe out for 4 seconds.
  • Repeat 9 more times, to make 10 sets.
  • Do the same again, but this time breathing in for 6 seconds. Breathing out normally at the end of each 6 seconds.
  • Now try and do the reverse kegel 10 times with normal breathing. See how much harder it is when you’re breathing out?
  • Finally hold the relaxed pushing out feeling for 30 seconds or as long as you can.

This is only a basic example routine, and you can add more sets and times to it as you get better at it.

Plan B

This time instead of doing the reverse kegels after the normal ones, you can do them alternately. Again it’s up to you to decide how to mix the sets, and it doesn’t really matter how you do it. Just don’t overdo it by doing it too many strong kegels.

Plan C

The final way is to do the normal kegal routine on one day, and the reverse routine either at a separate time the same day, or even the next day.

There’s no scientific evidence suggesting one way is better than another, so in my opinion you should aim for variety. Muscles are clever things and they adapt to training quickly. So the more you surprise them, the better the results.

Still having trouble identifying the right muscles?

Many guys have left comments saying they just can’t identify the right muscle to use in reverse kegels.

The best way really is to focus on the muscle you need to use to make yourself pee faster. You can play around with the concept a few times to help you.

Another way is to stand up when you have an erection. If you do a normal kegel, you should notice your penis rises slightly or maybe even a lot. If you then do a reverse kegel, you should notice it drops downwards.

Your views

Have you tried kegels or reverse kegels? Have they helped you to last longer, or are you still struggling with understanding them?

Feel free to share your thoughts or questions in the comments below.

273 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Hi Ethan, im a bit confused. While masturbating, should I be doing reverse kegels? Will that help lengthen my sessions? Or should the rkegel be done when im about to orgasm?

    • Hi Adam

      Let me try to put it simply and see if that helps:-)

      1. when masturbating don’t do any kegels – just try to relax that whole area naturally.
      2. If you get too aroused, you can experiment with a reverse kegel to see if it helps reduce your arousal – it’s kind of like ‘forced relaxation’ when relaxation on its own start failing.
      3. If you get super aroused and feel close to cumming, do a normal strong kegel hold to stop it.
      4. Rest and then carry on again.

  • Hi Ethan,
    I never really had a big problem with PE until recently, I wouldn’t necessarily last long enough but a good 5 minutes I would say. This is all with no condom btw, anyway, just recently i haven’t been able to last for over a minute and it is really worrying me. I feel like i haven’t been satisfied with my initial duration of 5 mins or so which got me feeling stressed and therefore lead to me not even lasting for a minute which is terrifying. i started doing the kegels & reverse kegels exercise just recently, but i feel like the kegels might have a negative effect on me because that contraction of the muscle sometimes just happens naturally during sex? Do you have any advice on how i can get back to my natural self because i find it hard to believe that you can all of a sudden develop severe PE when you it wasn’t that bad. And also any advice on the kegels, should i stop doing the kegel exercise and just work on the reverse kegels from now on?
    Thank you in advance.

    Marc

    • Hi Marc
      I understand your worries completely. Actually, there are two main forms of PE – lifelong and acquired, so it sounds like you have the latter. Why it happened now is impossible for me to say, and it could be for various reasons. But as you say, perhaps anxiety about your lasting time in general got you thinking about it, and then worrying, which in turn has led to quicker ejaculation. Perhaps if you’re feeling tense in bed thinking about it, that’s what’s making you ejaculate quicker.
      My advice is to focus on getting the thought out of your head when you’re having sex, relaxing both your body and mind, and turning your attention to how your body feels all over, and put yourself into the moment. Don’t get stuck in your thinking process while having sex.
      To help you do that, you can do some slow breathing exercises before and during sex, spend more time on reverse kegels than kegels and don’t do any strong kegel holds during sex if you can avoid it.
      And on a general level, maybe introduce some stress relief activity to your daily life – take up yoga, meditation, exercises or anything that helps you unwind. It can make a big difference to your body and mind so when it comes to sex, you should also be a little more relaxed.
      But again, I’d say the main thing is to avoid thinking about time at all before or during sex. Remember that it’s not all about penetrations and orgasms – enjoy more foreplay, manual and oral and enjoy the intimacy with your partner as much as possible. Even if you ejaculate quickly, forget about it and just move on to give your partner more attention in other ways like oral.
      Ethan

  • Hi thanks for the artcile
    I am experiencing some wierd things u could maybe help me understand
    so basicly after doing the kegels and the reverse one’s for a while i got a good control of my ejaculation
    and then one day while masturbating i got relaxed and contract an area that i couldnt feel before and that get me insta cum its a wierd feeling i can fell the orgasm through my legs not like a normal orgasm more like a prostat orgasm
    by doing this i can cum in 20 sec ez xD
    i didnt find anything talking about this on the internet

    • Hi Zak
      I think…though I’m not 100% certain…that I know what you mean. Does it give you a strange all-body sensation? Almost like a vibration, centered in the legs, but also in the upper body to an extent?
      Ethan

        • Hi Zak
          That sounds familiar – almost like a sensation you can just turn on and off at will, and quite strange too. It’s interesting to play with the feeling and see where it can take you!
          Ethan

  • hi ethan, thank you for the clear explanation. I read several articles about this before yours but none explained it so well. I had some positive results with kegels and can sometimes block my ejaculation on a good day. but the idea of relaxing with reverse movements sounds like it could be even better…if i ever get it right lol

    • Hi Lloyd
      Thanks for that! It’s always nice to know my articles are appreciated:-)
      Yes, reverse kegels – or the concept of just staying relaxed – can be very effective if you get it right. It’s not easy, but definitely worth keeping practicing.
      Ethan

  • Hi,
    Thanks for great article. Had a question about using reverse kegel – during the stop-start practice should I try to relax pelvic floor? If I touch with finger pelvic floor area during the practice I can feel tight, hard muscles(?). Should it be relaxed instead like in a normal time?

    • Hi A
      You’re welcome, it’s always good to hear readers like the articles!
      Yes, try to keep the pelvic floor muscles as relaxed as possible when doing the stop-start. If you get close to the point of no return, you can try to do a strong contraction to hold back, but at all other times, relaxation is the key.
      You may be feeling tightness as a natural part of becoming aroused, or having involuntary contractions as the process of ejaculation starts. I wouldn’t worry about it too much – just focus on relaxation and don’t get caught up on the exact levels of tightness you can feel. The more you focus on them, the more you’ll worry if a muscle you’re touching is too tight or not.
      Ethan

  • my pelvic muscle are very tight… may be its due to regular long drive.. so that i got frequent urination unable to empty my bladder i feel something like cramping sensation below to my penies.. SO MY DOUBT WHILE DOING THIS EXERCISE SHALL I USE ANY MUSCLE RELAXANT GEL OR SPRAY (volini} IN PELVIS MUSCLE AREA???

    • Hi Dass
      To be honest, I’m not really qualified to advise you on whether you should use muscle relaxants or not in your situation. My feeling would be that you should mention this to your doctor if you can. If you’re having issues with bladder control, they can perhaps check you over for any physical cause. It might be that they can provide a better solution than doing kegels.
      Ethan

  • I feel as if when using the muscle to force out urine faster, the muscle that also pushes a fart out is used. Can’t seem to isolate them each seperately. Is that normal? Finding it quite difficult to isolate them both..

    • Hi Aj
      I know it’s very difficult to isolate them, and really that’s understandable since the muscles of the pelvic floor are all connected. So yes, it’s normal to feel both movements as you describe, especially when you start practicing. I also think it’s fine to learn to relax the whole area, so there’s no need to worry if you just can’t seem to isolate them. As long as the BC muscle is being relaxed when you do reverse kegels, it’s ok if the other muscles also relax.
      Ethan

  • I just can’t seem to get the hang of it. So if I’m right in thinking, it’s not doing a crap kind of feeling that’s important, it’s pushing out pee, right? But when I do reverse kegels I should relax but not push out? what if I’m in bed and I try to do the pee motion, but obviously not do it – will that help?

    • Hi Ronny
      I know, it’s a confusing movement to understand. You’re first description is totally right, so that’s a good sign!
      You can either try to relax the pelvic floor muscles, or give a gentle push to help you identify the muscles first, and then relax them. You can do the pee motion if you feel it will help, but just do it briefly and lightly, before then focusing on relaxation again.
      Ethan

  • I’ve been going kegels and reverse kegels for a couple months, and am seeing some progress, plus I can get much harder erections than before which is cool. But should I do the start and stop technique also or just kegels until I feel I have complete control? Great article btw

    • Hi Terence
      I think definitely do the start and stop technique along with the kegels. You can try to stay relaxed and do reverse kegels if needed when you’re on the start bit, and just as you get to the stop point, do a strong kegel squeeze to practice holding back.
      Ethan

  • Thanks for the great article and clear explanation! I’ve read a few reverse kegel articles, but this is the best so far.

    • Hi Don
      You’re very welcome, and thanks very much for taking the time to leave such a nice comment.
      Ethan

  • Hi I have a question if the kegels are going to help me I have problem with PE when I was a kid I tried to mas. Alot and ejac. Fast as possible so idk wht to do when I do normal kegels it actualy becomes worst and I get much more tension and exitement and I cum faster what should I do should I practice kegels or edge or both.

    • Hi nick
      Unfortunately you’ve probably read one of the millions of articles on the internet talking about kegels, but the person who wrote it has no idea and is just repeating articles they’ve also read!
      Doing normal kegels all the time is likely to make you ejaculate quicker, because you’re basically pumping the same muscles used for ejaculation. So the idea is to keep them relaxed as much as possible, either by not doing any kegels and just trying to keep your pelvic floor relaxed, or by doing reverse kegels.
      At the end of the day, the experts are still not quite sure how kegels should be best used, so my advice is to avoid strong kegels and try to keep your whole body as relaxed as possible.
      And yes, edging is an effective technique to practice.
      Ethan

    • Its true that kegels will make you cum if you do them all the time. Ethan is right. Relax and let your body stay relaxed when you have sex.

  • Great post, I m glad i found it now that is still recent. I guess I need to practice some reverse kegel, but I prefer asking cause i m not sure.
    I suffer of soft erections , i get a kind of good erection just after manipulating the penis cause it s Like shriveled, dried and turtled in. I m always anxious and nervous…. And i Hardly manage to poo when i need, and i have to milk my bulbocavernous part under my testicles to pull out all the per left.
    This feeling of shrunk faccid penis brought me to always touch my penis till to masturbate to bring a bit of life, a bit of blood to my penis that in This way can expand even il not fully.
    So i m masturbating and ejaculating At last 3 times per day every day, no exceptions since long time.
    The shrunk faccid state is not permanent. Some days in a row happens my faccid penis hang low and well, is much fuller and i ha e rock erection easily and for long with minimal refractory period. I also experience in those happy days spontaneous erections and morning woods as when i was a teenager, now i m 34.
    Well, i never understood why that problem diseappear for few days and then come back for whole weeks. I recently noticed that when i m desperatly trying to poo after failing for several days and pulling my unus off as much as i can, my penis get fuller, hangs low and large as i ricognize it to be my normal faccid penis. Sometimes it remains Like that for days and i get great erections since, Sometimes no, but it s already a positive thing in a bad condition.
    Do you think i should just do reverse kegel…. or also normal kegel?
    If my understanding is correct, my pelvic floor is complete tensed, so i should avoid normal kegel.
    Any advice?
    Think you

    • Hi Massimo
      I’m glad you liked the post. To be honest, I’m not sure I completely understand the details of your situation. And so if I don’t totally understand, I feel it would be wrong to give you advice.
      Having said that, if you think you have a tense pelvic floor and it’s causing you serious problems, discomfort, anxiety etc, then really the best thing to do is to speak to a doctor and/or physiotherapist. They can give you a proper examination and tell you the right exercises, if any are needed.
      Now, if you don’t feel comfortable going to see someone about this, then you have to do what you think is right. If you feel you have a tense pelvic floor, then I would work on your overall anxiety first. Perhaps by tackling the psychological anxiety through self-help, and maybe doing things like yogs, stretching, tai-chi, meditatation or anything which can help you relax, you might find it helps.
      You could try doing reverse kegels, but if you have problems with your pelvic floor, getting them right can be quite tricky. So my advice is to take an overall approach to mental and physical relaxation for a few weeks first and see if that helps.
      Ethan

  • Hi Ethan,
    I’ve been experimenting recently with the reverse kegels. During masturbation I’ve feel the ejaculation building and do a reverse kegel to calm down while still stroking. I get to ejaculation and then come but it kind of dribbles out is less intense and happens over a long period time. Are reverse kegels used similarly to kegels in the way that you have to stop and do the reverse kegel or is there something else I’m missing?

    • Hi Issac
      I see what you mean. I think you’re just missing one point here – if you’re doing a reverse kegel and continuing to ejaculate, even slowly, then it means you missed the point when you should have either stopped stroking and rest for a while, or switch to a stronger normal kegel hold to stop yourself from ejaculating.
      Ultimately, if you do reverse kegels and continue stroking, at some point you will ejaculate – you can’t hold back forever. So you still need to be aware of the point of no return and stop just before you get there.
      Does that answer your question?
      Ethan

  • Hi Ethan,

    Thank you for that wonderful article.

    I am one of those who overdid kegels in a wrong way (used to contract my pelvic floor muscles the hardest, longest I could, everyday). I never practiced reverse kegels.

    After having stopped doing them altogether for 5+ months, I am still having trouble contracting my pelvic floor muscles. They feel very weak when contracted, and have trouble holding the contraction. The quality of my erections decreased.

    What do you recommend in this case, knowing that I would really love to do normal kegels correctly in the future? Sorry if that have been asked I couldn’t find something related on the website.
    Thank you in advance,
    Peter.

    • Hi Peter
      I’m glad you liked the article, thanks for saying!
      Sorry to hear about the problem you’ve had with kegels. You’re definitely not alone – several guys have written to me saying they’ve had problems after not finding advice about over-doing it on other websites.
      To be totally honest, I’m still not entirely sure what the best thing is to do in cases like yours. Since I’m not a doctor, there’s a limit to the advice I can give, and I’m kind of left to give my opinion based on what I’ve read elsewhere and found through my own practice.
      So really, I think perhaps the best thing – if you can face it – is to speak to your doctor and get their advice, and perhaps see a physical therapist. They might be able to give you exercises to untighten the pelvic floor and strengthen it in the right way.
      I actually recently read an interesting article about whether you should do kegels or not on a pelvicpainrehab.com. Have a read, as it might help you understand your situation a bit better.
      Ethan

  • Hi Ethan,

    Not sure if you are still answering questions here but thought I would leave a question and hope for the best I’ve been doing Kegels for a while now and noticed that I can contract the muscles pretty firmly and when I do I feel a tightening in the shaft and a swelling in the head of the penis Other times I have tried to concentrate on only contraction of the pevic floor (PB) muscles without the tension in the shaft and swelling of the penis head. My question is one method of contracting better then the other or is their not real benefit of one over the other. Any thoughts on the matter would be appreciated.

    Mike

    • Hi Mike
      Yes, I always answer all comments on my articles, not matter how old! I’m a big believer in helping guys as much as possible, even if there’s a long gap in between comments (just so any future readers know too!)

      When you feel the swelling, that means you’re doing a normal kegel correctly. So that’s the type of kegel to do either to help yourself get a stronger erection when needed, or to do a very tight squeeze if you feel you’re on the verge of ejaculating.

      I don’t see any reason to squeeze the other muscles unless helping with other problems such as incontinence.

      However, if you can do the reverse and relax all, or any, of the pelvic floor muscles, it might help you keep your arousal level down during sex. So in some ways it’s fine to learn to isolate the different muscles when practicing kegels, but during sex, try to keep all of them nice and relaxed…unless you need to call into action that tight squeeze.

      Hope that helps
      Ethan

  • nice article Ethan, thank you for the clear description. I’ve tried for a few weeks now to do reverse kegels, but wasn’t sure if i was doing them right or not. But it’s defo clearer after reading this, and it looks like i was on the right lines. thanks again.

    • Hi Hector
      Thanks, I’m glad you like the article and that it’s helped you work out if you were doing the kegels correctly or not. Good luck with them!
      Ethan

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