Reverse Kegels – My Step By Step Guide

Out of all the premature ejaculation techniques, reverse kegels seem to cause the most confusion – especially when learning which muscles to use.

Despite the initial difficulty, it’s worth sticking with it, as it’s a useful technique for keeping yourself calm during sex. And in my experience, it’s more effective than repeatedly trying to keep the point of no return at bay with your strongest kegel squeeze.

In this article, you’ll learn exactly how to do reverse kegels and why it’s important to practice them alongside normal kegels. I’ll also suggest how to add reverse kegels into the routine described in my complete guide to kegels (a free article, in case you’re wondering).

Why are reverse kegels difficult?

The physical ‘how to’ is the part that people struggle with the most. It’s not easy working out which muscles to target, and even harder to do the right thing with those muscles.

There are three reasons I think men have problems with this:

  • You haven’t done enough normal kegels, so you don’t understand the muscles involved.
  • The movement you need to do is a bit strange, which makes you doubt it’s right.
  • Knowing exactly when to do reverse kegels during sex is confusing in itself.

Many readers have left comments or emailed me in the years since first writing this article to say they aren’t sure if they’re doing it right. So I’ve since edited it to try and make it as clear as possible.

First learn normal kegels

The best way to identify the correct muscles is to first learn the normal version. Reverse kegels are targeting the same muscles, but in a more subtle way.

These aren’t muscles you normally have an awareness of, and it can take time to develop the ability to either squeeze or relax them.

So if you get the hang of normal ones, you’ll have a better chance of being sure you’re doing reverse kegels correctly.

Reverse kegels step by step

Step 1

Remember the classic kegel instructions about stopping yourself in the middle of peeing? This time, when you go for a pee try to gently force it out faster instead.

This is basically a reverse kegel of the key muscle – the Bulbocavernosus muscle – located at the base of the penis. You only need to do this once to get an idea for what it feels like. After that don’t try forcing out your pee any more and continue on to the next steps.

Step 2

Sit comfortably in a chair and relax for a few moments. Now gently try to simulate the muscle movement you would make if trying to do a poo or fart (don’t blame me for any accidents!)

This movement will be doing a reverse kegel of the Pubococcygeus muscle. Though it will also probably engage the Bulbocavernosus muscle as well.

Note: It’s unclear how important it is to be able to do a reverse kegel with both the front and back muscles. In my experience, the front one (Bulbocavernosus muscle) is more effective in controlling ejaculation.

However, it’s good to try to learn both as you may find that you need to focus on relaxing the entire area to develop any kind of control. Isolating them takes a lot of practice, so don’t worry if the whole area moves when practicing. Better control should develop naturally in time.

Step 3

Did you notice in both of these steps some movement in your stomach muscles, perhaps expanding or tensing? If not, do them again and you’ll probably notice some movement or tension.

This isn’t something to aim for when doing reverse kegels eventually, but it can help at the start to identify the correct movement.

Step 4

Now it’s time to add some breathing. Do the same steps again, but this time breathe in while doing them and allow your belly to expand. This is known as breathing from the diaphragm.

Most people breathe by expanding their chest. But you can also breathe by expanding your stomach instead. You might find that doing this helps you focus the movement on the BC muscle.

Step 5

Now you can put it all together. Do the simulated peeing and pooing motion, but also breathing out slowly from your belly, whilst keeping some light tension in the belly.

With the breathing and tensing, you should feel much more able to isolate the muscles and do a good reverse kegel. It does take practice though, so keep at it. You can try this for a few minutes a day until you get it right.

Step 6

Now for the really tricky part. Can you do reverse kegels without the help of breathing and tensing?

This can take a lot of practice, and even then you may never be able to do it without at least a little tension and stomach expansion. That’s fine, just try to reduce how much you rely on using the stomach to get the job done.

The key point here is that you need to be really relaxed. You need to mentally go inside your body and visualize the muscles relaxing and pushing out slightly.

Breathe slowly, deeply and relaxed while doing so, and try to focus on the area where the BC muscle is. Allow it to relax just by keeping your mind on it and trying to gently encourage it with your muscle control.

Step 7

Now’s the time for some real practice. While masturbating you can try to do 3 different things.

  1. Do normal kegels and see what effect it has on your sense of control.
  2. Switch to reverse kegels and see what happens to your physical arousal and control.
  3. Then try to just relax the whole area.

There’s no set way to do this, and it involves some experimenting and creativity from you. In my experience, it took a couple of weeks of playing around with the concept 3 or 4 times a week.

Eventually, I discovered that keeping relaxed was best. And when I felt tension creeping in, doing a reverse kegel could help restore the relaxation.

Step 8

If you have a partner you can eventually try reverse kegels during sex. In my experience, it’s best to do it when you’re on your back and she’s on top.

That way you have the best chance of relaxing and isolating the correct muscles. Again, some experimentation with positions might be needed before you find the right one to help you focus and relax.

Why are reverse kegels important?

This is an important point to remember: some men try to train very strong pelvic floor muscles because they read somewhere that it can stop them ejaculating.

Then they go overboard and try to hold the muscles as much as possible during sex. Either that or they think it gives them a better erection, so they continually pump the BC muscle during sex.

This is counterproductive though and encourages quicker ejaculation. Instead, normal kegel holds should only be done at the very last moment to try to stop yourself ejaculating. Or in the beginning to help yourself get a good erection.

If you’re trying to last longer, then at all other times during sex you should keep the PC and BC muscles relaxed. And doing reverse kegels is one way to accomplish this for three reasons:

  • By training reverse kegels along with normal ones, you develop balance and control of the pelvic floor muscles
  • If you aren’t able to keep relaxed during sex, then actively doing the motion of reverse kegels can help to achieve the relaxed pelvic floor you need to be able to last longer
  • If you train it to a high level, you may be able to do reverse kegels so well that you can stop yourself ejaculating. You can do this before the point of no return and it’s usually more successful than waiting until the point when you need to do normal kegels.

So in some ways, you’re giving yourself two opposite weapons in the battle. You can do reverse kegels and keep relaxed as much as possible. Then if it all fails, switch to a normal kegel squeeze just before the moment of no return.

And finally, doing reverse kegels can help stop you from overtraining and creating an imbalance in your pelvic floor. So work on balance and control, not just strength.

A reverse kegel routine

Here are some ways to incoporate reverse kegels into a training regime with the normal version:

Plan A

You can do each normal kegel routine each day as described. Then at the end spend 2 or 3 minutes practicing reverse kegels.

So you could do this:

  • Sit or lie down and relax for a minute.
  • Breathe in for the count of 4 seconds and do a reverse kegel. Either with or without tension and belly breathing. Do whichever you can manage.
  • Stop, relax and breathe out for 4 seconds.
  • Repeat 9 more times, to make 10 sets.
  • Do the same again, but this time breathing in for 6 seconds. Breathing out normally at the end of each 6 seconds.
  • Now try and do the reverse kegel 10 times with normal breathing. See how much harder it is when you’re breathing out?
  • Finally, hold the relaxed pushing out feeling for 30 seconds or as long as you can.

This is only a basic example routine, and you can add more sets and times to it as you get better at it.

Plan B

This time instead of doing the reverse kegels after the normal ones, you can do them alternately. Again it’s up to you to decide how to mix the sets, and it doesn’t really matter how you do it. Just don’t overdo it by doing it too many strong kegels.

Plan C

The final way is to do the normal kegal routine on one day, and the reverse routine either at a separate time the same day, or even the next day.

There’s no scientific evidence suggesting one way is better than another, so in my opinion you should aim for variety. Muscles adapt to training quickly, so the more you surprise them, the better the results.

Still having trouble identifying the right muscles?

Many readers have left comments saying they can’t identify the right muscle. The best way really is to focus on the muscle you need to use to make yourself pee faster.

Another way is to stand up when you have an erection. If you do a normal kegel, you should notice your penis rises. If you then do a reverse kegel, you should notice it drops downwards.

Your thoughts

Have you tried kegels? Feel free to share your experience and ideas, or ask questions below.

Even if some time has passed since the last comment, I never close comments on this site, so you will get a response.

377 thoughts on “Reverse Kegels – My Step By Step Guide”

  1. I can only do a RK when trying the duece or gas method, but without having to pee i cannot locate the muscle to do a front RK? any suggestions on how i may do that … i feel like that back RK will not help my PE very much

    1. And also if i am doing it right for front, is there any telltale signs that im doing it right like physical feel. cause when i do back RK i can feel a push more towards anus but cant really tell for front

      1. Hi
        You will feel an internal sensation, kind of like a dull throbbing. If you have an erection you might also notice that you can move the penis upwards by doing the kegel.

    2. Hi Jordan
      It’s probably just that the muscle aren’t developed well enough yet. Keep practising from time to time and it should become easier to locate when not peeing.

  2. Hello,

    Is it the right thing to do: Maintain a mid/light Reverse kegel the Whole Time during sex. And do a Hard Reverse kegel when you are close to PONR?

    I want to have your advice before trying, thank you all !

    1. Hi Mick
      Yes, that’s pretty much it. Though hopefully if done correctly, the reverse kegel can so effective you never need to actually get to the point of using the normal hard kegel!

  3. Hi, very well written article.

    I think I have tried everything and every attempt has worsened it. I have 70 degree curve on my penis, have been doing Jelqs for 5 months. I have premature ejaculation and have been doing edging and kegels for 5 months also and it gets worse. I have recently been having spasms between my balls and anus… and now can’t even have an erection… I have read that these exercises can in fact be dangerous for men, never believed it due to good testimonies. I guess I’m just one of those unlucky ones… my wife left me… I won’t kill myself, don’t have the courage, but every day I just wish I would disappear, not exist. I feel there is nothing more I can do, just give up.

    1. Hi there
      I’m very sorry to hear you’ve been having these difficulties and that it’s led to your current state of mind. I can’t imagine what you’ve been going through.
      Please don’t give up hope though! You’re right in that some guys do end up with problems because of doing kegels either too much, incorrectly or through sheer bad luck I guess. But that doesn’t mean the problem can’t be reversed!
      My advice would be to stop all kegels and start doing relaxation exercises for the whole body. Edging is usually very effective, but of course there are always some guys who have premature ejaculation for reasons beyond arousal control. So it may be that your best best is a desensitizing product or perhaps even something a doctor can prescribe.
      Have you spoken to a doctor about your situation, both physical and emotional? Perhaps it’s not the easiest topic to bring up, but I think it could be a positive step to speak to a professional about how you feel.
      So, my advice, and it’s just advice is this:
      1. Stop kegels completely
      2. Do relaxation exercises – look this up on google and you’ll find many different ways you can approach physical relxation.
      3. Speak to a doctor about how you feel currently. And if the relaxation doesn’t help in a few days, also speak about the spasms.
      4. If you feel like tackling the stamina issue from a different perspective, try a delay spray.
      Above all, stay strong and don’t give up hope!

    2. Good news is your condition is called Peyronies and is easily fixable.To inform yourself watch the Embarrassing Bodies program from Channel 4 UK where you will find a video of the “doable” operation and the before and the “happy” after.
      Your Penis problems seems to be seriously affecting your mind through anxiety. First step is get your magic wand fixed, the next is to start rebuilding and caring after your spiritual needs…join a team sports club (not gym) + church or some community initiative where you will be with other people so that your stress levels will reduce. Lord bless.

  4. Hi,

    I’ve never had a problem with PE until recently. Had always used a condom which desensitized me some. Never really lasted for hours or anything, but usually long enough for pleasure, wife always seemed fine with shorter sessions. Then last year I got snipped and we were able to ditch the condoms, which has been great. Combine that with a conscious effort to masterbate way less and now my stamina is gone. It varies but normally only a few minutes and sometimes I get aroused super quick and I can’t last more than a few seconds.

    Reverse kegels? I’ve done them some but my anus always feels sore the next day.
    Start and stop?

    What will help?

    1. Hi SMO
      Thanks for your comment. It sounds to me like it’s a combination of things maybe contributing to your situation. The lack of condoms and less frequent masturbation probable being the main things. My personal advice would be to masturbate regularly if it used to help with the control, which it probably did. Also, perhaps try sex with a condom once or twice. If you last much longer, you’ll know it’s the sensitivity that’s causing the control problem. I imagine it is.
      If your anus feels sore, you’re probably doing the reverse kegels too hard or incorrectly. Yes, the start and stop method can help. My normal advice would be to learn all the different behavioral techniques and perhaps try a delay spray. But in your case, I’d hold off for now. Try masturbating a few hours before sex and you might find that helps you last longer. And if not, try with a condom and see if it’s the sensitivity issue. Then you can either try ways to control your arousal better, or just give yourself more time to get used to having more stimulating sex.
      Hope that helps!

  5. Hi ethan!
    Great article! I Been trying to do reverse kegels for a few days now, but when i do them i accidentely urinate a little bit. Do you have any idea of what im doing wrong?

    1. Hi Isak
      I’m glad you like the article! It sounds like you’re doing them too hard probably. I would firstly empty your bladder before doing the exercises. Then don’t push so hard. And also make sure you balance them with normal kegels.

  6. Hi Ethan – I recently started dating a girl about 6 months ago and we’ve moved away from condoms as she got onto birth control and we wanted the additional stimulation from the sex we are having. That being said, I have traditionally had no problem lasting at least 10 minutes during sex, with or without a condom. Over the past few weeks, I have not been able to avoid ejaculating within the first minute or so of insertion. I literally go from soft, to hard, and ejaculating within a minute or two and sometimes even before insertion!

    As you can imagine, it has started messing with my psyche. I’ve started looking up methods for lasting longer, things like kegels, and reverse kegels (I am really only interested in natural methods). I wanted to get your feedback and opinion on the issue I am having. I feel like it is a mental issue that has gotten into my head, but I am trying to fix it with physical strategies (kegels, reverse kegels).

    Have you heard of situations like this in the past? Can I expect the situation to get better after getting further into the relationship? What can I do to help myself with the situation I am having? If you were me, what would you do to help yourself with the situation?

    Your help is much appreciated. Thx

    1. Hi Jason
      Thanks for your comment. I think sometimes its hard to work out whether its really mental, physical or both, especially as one can lead to the other. I imagine it will get better in time, especially once you get used to her. I think sometimes we do just meet someone who makes it harder to last longer, for various reasons. So if you had control in the past, I’m sure you will get it back in time. If you’re only interested in natural techniques, I’d get a decent training guide like the ejaculation trainer for example. I’d read it, practice the techniques when alone and also with my partner. But above all I’d try not to panic, and remember that sex doesn’t stop when you ejaculate. If you do ejaculate quickly, don’t make a big deal of it and give her some oral, manual and other enjoyable things until you’re ready to go again.

  7. Hie Ethan…i luv ua article..its best on explaining RKs but am having a difficulty in practicng them in that once i release my tensed belly then iam losing the grip of the pushing like am abt to poo or pee…i dont kno hw i can do this without a contracted belly…& i also i hav to always hold my breath to simulate the pee or poo to feel those muscles around my anus…so hw i can i feel the muscles by pushing them without holding my breath & without a contracted belly?…wil greatly appreciate ua answer .

    1. Hi mdubz
      Thanks for your comment and I’m glad you enjoyed the article. Yes, it’s much harder to do the reverse kegel action without tensing muscles or holding your breath. The important thing to remember is that you’ll never be able to replicate the same force when you’re doing it without tensing or holding your breath, and thats ok. The idea is that its auite a subtle feeling and movement doing a reverse kegel. So just keep practicing and dont expect to be able to feel dramatic movement when doing a reverse kegel properly.
      Hope that help

  8. Dear Ethan
    I m 26 yrs old acute PE & Urine incontinence suffering guy. I am unmarried and these problem are of masturbating time… However i have had sex 2-3 times but condition are same as during masturbation.
    I have very easy erection with no problem. but sometime as i become hard it seems my penis get filled with semen and with 2-4 strokes i fired. I am very frustrated with zero confidence.
    I have exercize kegel it solve my urine incontinence and give me hard erection with severe pe. Now i want to start RK, I think it would help me in PE.
    Next month i m going to marry. What should i do…
    will RK work alone in my pe?
    Should i do balanced kegel with RK?
    or Start stop method with RK will work for me?
    Waiting you kind response

    1. Hi Abs
      Thanks for your comment. I think perhaps doing a more balanced kegel routine might help, along with the start stop technique. But if you think the kegels caused the pe, but also helped the incontinence, I guess you need to be careful how much you do of any type of kegel. So if I were you I’d go easy on them, don’t overtrain, and spend more time understanding arousal control.
      Congratulations on your upcoming marriage! Do remember as well that there is a whole worold outside of penetration! Do some research on good foreplay and oral and your new wife will love you for it.

  9. hey Ethan. After deciding to take action in reducing or curing my PE, and reading several articles and books, and how they all emphasize reverse kegeling or, more informally, a relaxed pubic floor muscle, I payed attention to this and realized that I’m tensing my pelvic muscle all the time! I mean it’s probably in constant tension, albeit not an extreme tension, but more like a middle ground. But definitely not relaxed. Is this rare? Now for a few days I’ve been paying attention to this and actually relaxing those muscles whenever I sense they’re tense, which is almost always, so I’m doing that countless times a day. Is this a good thing? Should I aim at a relaxed pelvic floor all the time, or would that affect my erections in some way?

    1. Hi Stu
      Thanks for your comment, and glad you hear you’ve found the source of the problem – that’s a great start!
      You raise an interesting question there. I think that it’s probably not good to focus on doing it all the time. My opinion is that you need to be a little careful with kegels, both normal and reverse. Overdoing it can lead to some other problems. So maybe do some exercises for a couple of minutes once a day, and then when you masturbate or have sex, but don’t focus on it all day would be my advice.
      All the best

  10. Thanks for this, this is by far the best article about reverse kegels i have found yet but i still have alot of trouble figuring out how to do them. i try and force my pee out faster to locate this muscle but nothing happens, my pee stream remains the same which is kind of weak. im 20 years old i know i have a tence pc muscle because of bad masterbation habbits growing up and masterbating to porn to much. im too scared to have sex becasue of this, its so awful but i really believe if i can learn how to do this reverse kegel it will change my life so much and i will be forever grateful. This being said can someone please help me to figure out how to do these, ive read so much on these but i still cant figure it out. i really wish someone would put a video up showing them do this properly and giving good details as to how to and how to know if you are correctly. i believe reverse kegels are a huge break through for so many people with premature ejac. there just needs to be more light on this… please help me sorry for this long post but this means so much to me…Thanks, zack

    1. Hi Zack
      Thanks for your comment, and I can understand your frustration, believe me. Have you read through all the comment and my replies? Lots of guys have also said they have problems, so I have added extra ideas in the comments. There really is a wealth of information to be found here if you take the time to go through them.
      Having said that, it seems a bit unusual that you can’t force the pee to go faster. Have you tried tensing your stomach muscles at the same time as trying to find the right muscle to pee faster?
      If nothing else works, then to a certain extent, I think it’s possible to abandon the whole muscle isolation thing and simply focus on trying to relax the whole area overall. That’s something you can do lying down and masturbating, allowing yourself to get very aroused, maybe with slightly tense abs and leg muscles, then relax all those muscles and try to focus all your effort on a huge sense of relaxation in the groin. If you keep practicing this, you should eventually feel that your arousal reduces when you relax.
      Try that if you can’t find the muscles. I think it’s probably very effective too.

  11. Hi Ethan,
    Great article!!
    I am also suffering from acute PE as i can only last for 10-15 seconds while doing the intercourse/masturbate. I feel very depressed and tensed after the sex which is also effecting my work and daily life. your article seems to be quite informative. I hv started doing both the kegel since a week but can’t see any improvement(may be i need to be more patience and keep doing it for some more weeks). while doing these exercise, i start exploring my body’s activity to ejaculate and what I found is that from the start of masturbation or sex I feel a strong tingling at the head of penis which eventually increase very fast and forced me to ejaculate within the initial 10-15 secs. I feel my penis is full with sperm from the time it get erected. do you think these could be the main reason for my PE problem. do you think kegel will help me to gain some control.

    1. Hi John
      Thanks for your comment. I think if you’re feeling so aroused so early on, then you might benefit more from the start and stop method instead of kegels. That technique can be adapted to reduce your arousal even before you start stimulating your penis, which might help you gain more control.

  12. Hi I have issue doing Reverse Kegels please help :(

    So I can kegel upto 1second I think tops hopefully it improves but I cant rly train them if I cant do revverse kegels thus I might create unbalance ??? Damn annoying… I tried pushing the piss fast when urinating thats reverse kegel basicaly ( when u stop urinating its normal kegel ). I did that a few times and yet when not pissing I seem to be unable to do reverse kegels. It feels like I DO NOTHING. Or just tense my abs like push the abs / belly forwad and thats all. I cant seem to figure it out…

    Then I read this tip
    _____________________”my best tip is the one that works the best, breath with your nose to the belly bottom ( and not to your chest), while you doing it, put 2 fingerst between your anus and testicles ( when the PC muscle is) and one hand on your belly bottom, and feel how it expand a little, when you feel it, congrats! youve just done your “first” RK._____________________________

    So Yes im breathing with belly. I had 2 fingers between anus and testicles ( balls ) so basicaly under balls. And one hand on belly. So when I take breath in by belly goes forward ( top when I lay down ) and at that time I try to do RK but I feel nothing on the PC muscle location where I have 2 fingers, no movement at all. When I try to do normal kegel I can feel the movement. But not with RK.
    I think I dont know which muscle to use to RK. I think that when I piss and try to push it faster I dont know which muscle im using.
    Its really depressing because i want and need the RKs to solve the prematur ejac…. to be able to do the plateau edging and RKs by itself keep relaxed PC which is really important omg.

    As for your steps
    Yeah I saw that well my issue is on that…
    -Step 1 is easy
    -I cant do Step 2 because I fart rarely and Involunteraly… When I try to “let out gas” I dont know how
    -When they say “do a number two” I dont know what they mean
    -Step 3 I think im pushing out stomach yes but not because of the RK movement but just because my brain thinks I have to push belly
    -Step 4 easy I breath with belly
    -Step 5 Again I dont know what is “number two motion” and I cant do “simulated peeing” because when I try nothing happens. I dont know how to do the simulated peeing my brain doesnt know what to do.
    With the breathing and tensing, you should feel much more able to isolate the muscles and do a good reverse kegel
    I cant.

    Please help its insanely flustrating! :(

    1. Hi Mixim
      Sorry you’re having a frustrating time trying to get to work this out. To clear one thing up – a number two is what we sometimes call ‘doing a poo’ in england! So the motion is again like letting out gas, but obviously you don’t.

      Another way which you can use to try and see if you’re relaxing the right area is to see if you can relax your penis when it’s erect. If you have a full erection, and then do a reverse kegel, you should feel a little relaxing of the penis, and maybe even a slight softening.

      So what you can do is to lie down, then just stop masturbating and watch the response of your penis – does it relax or soften? does it relax quickly or take time? Then try again, but this time try the reverse kegel motion. If you do it right, you will feel the relaxing feeling like before, but it should happen faster and perhaps more of a relaxation than if you just simply stop.

      See if that helps you!

        1. Yo sorry for late answer again :D :D
          Im kind of busy lately…

          I tried the Rks during erection.. I dont really see difference if I dont do Rk and when I do.. hmm what to do?

        2. Hi Limi
          Don’t worry about it – I know the feeling!
          Well, I guess maybe you just need to practice more. It can take time to really see good results from reverse kegels. Don’t give up just yet though!

    2. i have read all the comments but for some reason i guess the muscle used to pee faster is very weak on me…i know how to completly relax when i pee and let it flow a bit harder but i dont know how to force my pee out in a constant way…i have always been a really tense person as far as muscle goes especially in my legs, like just bending down to touch my toes i was probably a good 4 inches away from touching. this was just a couple days ago but i have been doing alot of streches in the morning and i have been doing alot of lower body strethes the last couple days while breathing in deeply and trying to rk…i think maybe i have it down but not entirly sure…while stretching especially when im doing like a full resting squat i can breathe deeply and push out in the pubic area and also relax my butthole completly and it pushes out to…is this a reverse kegel or close to one…i have also noticed that in just the couple of days of me doing this my pee flow is more constant and i dont have to kegel more than once after im done peeing to get out the extra drops, i was having to kegel like 6 times after every pee before….oh and i also stopped watching porn and i havnt masterbated in a week im just trying to let my penic and pelvic floor recover from all the extensive tighting i have done over the years to them…anyways thank you so much for your posts and replying to me…and id like to know if im doing a rk or maybe im close and any more suggestions i think i might edge soon but for sure if i should yet and i would like to cum but i dont if i should…thanks:)

      1. No problem – glad you have helped a little. It does sounds like you’re getting close. I think you’re right in having a break from it. It’s important not to over-exercise the pelvic floor as too much tension or too much weakness can lead to problems. That’s why I reckon you might be better off just focusing on the edging technique instead and just remember to try to relax the whole body and especially the pelvic area while doing so.

  13. I look at it like this. Men can not urinate and ejaculate at the same time. Also, before a man ejaculates, the passage way to his bladder is closed to prevent semen and urine from mixing. So when you have sex, just try to urinate as long as you can without actually urinating. (Not sure if it’s possible to urinate with an erection.) but by doing this you keep the passage to your bladder open by forcing yourself to have to pee. This disallows you from ejaculating and makes you last longer.

    1. also I’m not sure if this is just me, but by keeping this forced peeing feeling, (trying to pee really hard) my erection gets bigger and more veiny, and I lose sensitivity. I noticed this when I was masturbating, I was tensing up my abs and had this tense sensation is my lower abdomen/pelvic bone area (I was tense to the point that I was physically trying my hardest to urinate with an erection)(this was also reversal level for the front muscle) and I noticed that I was literally masturbating without feeling anything and the only thought on my mind was my trying to pee. Once I released the tension my erection almost subsided because it felt so worn out, and I hadn’t even ejaculated! Honestly when I discovered this I felt like I found the holy grail to controlled ejaculation. I would suggest everyone to try this method and see if it works for them. Although the guide says to relax and have a sensation of peeing yourself, I found this this method works best for me. To each their own. Goodluck fellow PEers

      1. Hi Davis
        Thanks for all your comments and your thoughts. Whilst it’s great to hear from guys who have had success, I’m not sure I would fully endorse the technique of trying hard to pee yourself whilst having sex, or masturbating. I think that forcing the muscles that way is useful for working out which to use, but afterwards, the reverse kegel can be done more calmly without risking any muscular problems there, which I’ve heard some claim can result in problems with incontinence etc. So I would say to try to learn to relax that muscle, and if you’re going to use the peeing motion technique at all, only do it gently.

  14. Reverse kegel-front muscle-try to piss harder, boom you located that muscle.
    Reverse kegel-lower-try to poo yourself. Should feel a muscle in gooch area push out. Boom there’s the lower kegel
    Kegel-front-this is the one that controls stopping urine flow or the muscle you use to make an erect penis go up.
    Kegel-lower-I refer to this one as the anus clencher. Lol you are actually clenching your Anus but by contracting this muscle, you get a feeling in your anus.
    I find kegels harder to do when locating the two muscles because they both contract when working one or the other. It’s isolating the two and working them out separately that’s the hard part. As for reversal kegels, you can physically tell if you are isolating them. If you feel like you are about to poop and pee on yourself you haven’t isolated them. But if you feel like you aren’t trying to take a dump and the sensation or that feeling that pee is working its way through your urethra, congrats, you just did your first front isolated reverse kegal.

  15. Hey Ethan man,
    Great guide you have here, but my body is just messed up I think. Let me start by stating that I have extreme premature ejaculation (30 seconds). And after almost half a yeah of scouring the internet and getting information and looking at myself and what exactly is happening, I have narrowed it down to an extremely tensed pelvic floor.
    So, when I start stimulation, with hand or inside vagina, within 30 seconds, I do and HOLD a completely involuntary kegel. I promise you I do not try at all to hold it, in fact I try my best to relax but to no avail. The only way to end this kegel hold is to stop all physical stimulation.
    I feel like reverse kegels are going to be the key to solving my issue. However, yes another problem. I am direly afraid of doing so because I am unsure if I am doing a reverse kegel or a kegel. Because if I in fact am doing a kegel, then I am doomed, it will make my situation even worse and I can not imagine ejaculating faster.
    This is how I had planned to make sure the motion I was doing was in fact the reverse Kegel. I would go to the washroom and start peeing, then stop, and notice all the signs (behavior of stomach, testicles, perineum, penis) so these signs I would want to avoid correct? as they are signs of a kegel. Then I would relax and then pee hard (lol) and notice the surrounding behaviour again. These second set of behavior is what I would want while exercising as this is a reverse kegel am I right?
    However, the problem was that almost everything behaved identical except for the testicles. So they are literally my last hope now. So, when I kegel or stop peeing, my testicles are unaffected, or maybe a slight twitch. But when I reverse kegel (pee hard) they rise as high as the base of my penis (oh which by the way pulls in a bit as well when I reverse kegel).
    So I looked it up online. But to shatter my final hope, apparently the testicles rise with a kegel and do not with a reverse kegel. Now i’m completely confused as this is opposite to my 'peeing' test that I did. So Ethan, and anyone else here who are sure about there reverse kegels, please tell me, are my testicles supposed to rise and the base of my penis pull in when i reverse kegel?
    Not to be melodramatic but a few weeks ago i went through a breakup with a girl who i imagined the rest of my life with because of this problem. I am extremely depressed and would like to know what I should do next.

    Thank you very much, any help at all is appreciated.

    1. Hi there,

      Yes, unfortunately that’s right about the kegels. Though to be honest, when doing reverse kegels, there is very very little movement at all. It’s more an internal feeling of relaxation.
      It seems to me that maybe kegels isn’t the one for you. Perhaps trying other techniques would be better. Have a read of my article about why I think kegels aren’t the best technique for more details about that.

    2. To me it seems like reverse kegel is just trying to get you to urinate more than ejaculate. So while You have intercourse Try to focus on Peeing yourself, but dont literally pee on yourself. normally with an erect penis, you can not urinate. So I would say If you are to to point of urinating on yourself with an erextion, reverse kegels are definitely working for you though I do not think its health to be able to urinate with an erection. This is just the way I look at it and it works for me though. Once I began looking at it this way a lightbulb went off in my head. I went from ejaculating within seconds of intercourse to being able to last for 5-10 minutes. This is just with trying to pee on myself (reverse kegel) while having sex. also experimenting while reverse kegeling and masturbating, I began to get a fuller, veinier? Erection but a lose of sensitivity. That might be just me though.

  16. Hi Ethan!
    Really great article and the website! I think your article and all the comments and replies here are incredibly helpful for a lot a lot of people! Thank you so much for doing this!

    Here is my question: I have a PE problem. Sometimes i can last for 1min, sometime for 30sec only and sometimes, very rarely, especially with a new partner i can even ejaculate during a foreplay.
    My PC muscle or how it is called the pelvic floor is pretty tensed all the time during a day and of course during the sex.
    So my question is should i start with the normal kegels and the reversed or since I’m most of the time tense down there i should only practice the reversed ones?

    Thank you again!

    1. Hi Andrew

      Thanks for your comment and the kind compliments about the website. It’s always greatly appreciated.

      To answer your question, I think it’s good to maintain a balance when doing kegels, so I would do a bit of both. I do think that reverse kegels are ultimately more useful, but it’s still good to develop the area and the control you have.

      Just remember not to get too carried away with it, and make sure it’s not the only thing you do. It’s also essential to develop arousal control. That’s the reason I always suggest that guys look into getting one of the premature ejaculation books, so they get the full picture and hit the problem from every possible angle.


      1. Thanks so much for the reply Ethan!

        I’ll be checking the “ejaculator trainer” book as you have suggested and see the techniques to control my arousal level. Also I’ll start doing both kegels to gain control and balance in this area. I hope all this will help me beat my problem entirely.

        Thank you again for the great resource and for the prompt reply!!

        1. Hi Andrew
          You’re welcome. Good luck and have patience – I’m sure you’ll be able to deal with the problem if you follow those suggestions.

  17. Did anyone else think they were doing normal kegels and then read this to find out that they were reverse kegels? Thank you muchly for clearing that up. I’ve been doing both without knowing which was forward or backward.
    @Ethan too many kegels has not caused those people permanent problems I hope, I assume that they tired the muscle out, presumably if they rested for a long time function would return?

    1. Hi Sam
      I think a lot of guys get very confused over kegels, especially with so many articles online which don’t give detailed instructions. I hope that they aren’t permanent problems too, and I don’t think they will be.

    1. Hi Sabath
      Kegels can be practiced flaccid or erect. In my experience it’s better to do the routines when flaccid. Then when masturbating you can actually put it to the test and see if you can use kegels to help manage your arousal levels.

  18. A Thankful User

    First of all, thank you very, very much for this useful information, its almost a must read best seller. And also thank you for keeping up with all the questions and answers on the page, a lot of interesting information spread around, which also encourages me to ask something myself. Before reading your article, i started to figure out (based on my little experience) relaxation was the key, however i didn’t know how or what exactly, that has changed. And i’m very interested on starting practicing.

    Now question! While being with my gf i’ve noticed i get aroused very quickly, it surprises me how after ejaculating (little as i try to perform kegel) and passing all the relaxed time adverting the thingy its not going to rise up again, after 1 minute and with little help from my hands or her hands, it rises again and its ready to start; normally erect and with less sensitivity.

    Its weird, i just figure it out not long ago, and i’m not sure what to think of it.

    I’m seriously wondering if it could be healthy, if perhaps i’m getting ready to perform a last minute successful kegel, or if i should start saving to see a doctor lol

    Also this lets me to think that masturbation before sex could be a solution, and of that i’m not sure if its even healthy.

    I hope you could answer this questions of a 20y/o, and again, thank you, thank you very much sir.

    1. Hi there
      I’m happy you found the article useful. Thanks for saying so – it’s always nice to know readers enjoy an article.
      I think that probably you’re just a normal, healthy young man with a high sex drive and strong amount of testosterone flowing in your body. That’s why you’re ready to go again so soon after having sex once. Believe me, that will become a longer time as you get older! I used to be able to go again very soon when I was younger, but now in my later 30s it can take 30-60 minutes to be ready again. That’s normal.
      Many people say that masturbation before sex is a way to help you last longer, because you always last longer the second time round. But if you’re ready to go so quickly, then why not enjoy it all with your partner? They can stimulate yu manually or orally, if they enjoy that kind of thing, then have sex when you’re ready again.

  19. I think I had a bad habit, while masturbating I would stroke and thus tense my pc muscles a lot. It felt nice. I think that over time doing this has caused overly tight pc muscles because slowly i feel like im cumming faster and kinda uncontrollably. I have started doing reverse kegels but is that all i should focus on? What exactly do I need to do? Thanks.

    1. Hi Bruce
      First of all I would say stop doing the pc muscle tensing when masturbating. You might find that helps on its own. You an try and relax that area when masturbating and see what happens too. But I wouldn’t worry about getting into a routine of kegels. It may be all you need to do is reverse your habit and over time you’ll be ok.

  20. Hello Ethan,

    Thanks for your informative thread and blog as a whole.
    I wanted to share my experience with kegels and to consult with you regarding a possible issue that they may cause in the long turn. This is my story..
    I first experienced ejaculation control 5-6 years ago – i was very aroused and while masturbating i was able unwillingly just by instinct to hold my orgasm at the very beginning, thus some cum was ejaculated, but i noticed my erection and arousal was not over and i was able to proceed instantly with achieving orgasm with ejaculating the rest of the cum. I didn’t pay much attention back then i thought that this just happened on its own and there is no way to control it. I have experienced it some more times after that, but i was still not paying attention how its done as i thought i am just very horny when it happens.
    In the past few months i had a period of extensive masturbation for many hours, some days for more than 10+ hours. For personal reasons i wanted to avoid orgasm at all cost i wanted only the good feeling of being horny and stroking the penis, but without orgasm and ejaculation, so every time i felt orgasm is approaching by pure instinct i began to tighten my pelvic floor muscle (do a normal kegel). When i reached the so called “point of no return” it really feels like its impossible to return and just have to go with it and feel all the pleasuring waves and this is what i have done for many years, i just surrendered at this point. However after so many years it finally hit me and i found that if a normal kegel is done at this point, the orgasm is stopped right there. Usually a small amount of cum,(sometimes more, depend on the arousal and if i had previous ejaculations recently) is released, but without experiencing orgasm and the sexual interest remains high. I found that my penis stays hard and as a bonus a little less sensitive which is very good if the woman likes loooong play. After stopping the orgasm this way, i am still able to achieve full orgasm whenever i want even if its after a few seconds. I can also continue avoiding orgasm and returning from the point of no return as much as i want with this technique, however every time i do it a little amount of cum is ejaculated and after 5-6 times i am almost completely dry. This way i have 100% control over my ejaculations. As far as i have researched, my experience is only a step away from performing multiple dry orgasms, what do you think? Maybe at the point of no return i have to do everything the same as explained above, but applying a very strong kegel, tightening the muscle as much as i can, in order to not let any ejaculation to occur, or there is something else that i am missing? Also i am a little bit concerned if doing a very strong kegel or even not that strong at PONR can cause some injury and permanent retrograde ejaculation, what is your opinion? What do you think happens with the cum when a strong kegel is performed at PONR, does it go to the bladder or stays in the prostate/testicles? I will be very glad to hear from you, thanks in advance for your time and attention!

    1. Hi Aprince

      Thanks for your comment. So, my first advice is to be careful with doing too much kegels. Many guys claim that doing too many kegels can result in problems, such as trouble maintaining an erection, tightness, pain or even premature ejaculation getting worse. If you regularly masturbate for many hours a day (10+ really is a lot…), and are doing kegels throughout, especially strong ones, my feeling would be that you are potentially over-doing it.

      Now, that said, to answer your question I think that perhaps you’re waiting until too late to do the kegel if you want to have dry orgasms. Ejaculation happens in two phases, and if you only do the kegels at the second stage,, then it will be very difficult to prevent any emission at all, and also won’t be long before you feel like having an orgasm again. So perhaps try holding back a bit sooner than you are doing.
      If the fluid has already accumulated ready for ejaculation, then preventing it coming out may result in it being taken into the bladder or leaked out at a later point.

      Hope that helps!

  21. Hey Ethan,

    Loved your post man, i really learnt quite a bit from what your saying. i practiced reverse kegeling while masturbating and it really works. like you said it’s all about keeping that muscle right around your anus relaxed. but i do find it much easier to keep it relaxed while standing up and sitting. when im lying on my front or kneeling down, it’s a lot harder. Do you think i could be able to relax it completely in these positions after practicing reverse kegels for a while?..

    Also is practising reverse kegeling while masturbating a good practice for keeping those muscles relaxed and increase my ejaclation period?

    1. Hi Joseph,

      Thanks for your comment, and I’m glad you found the article useful. In answer to your questions:

      1) I also find it’s harder to keep relaxed in certain positions. But it can be achieved. I think any position which engages your stomach, lower back or leg muscles can be harder to keep that part of the body relaxed. That’s why I think lying on your back is the easiest.

      2) Yes, practicing it while masturbating is a good idea I think.

      All the best

  22. Should I stop masturbating regularly when I begin doing Kegels exercise, does daily masturbation can disrupt the strengthening of the pc, bc & ic muscles? Just wanna know :)Thanks

  23. After having done kegels and reverse kegels for a while and reaping the benefits, they have stopped working. I can only postpone ejaculation very briefly by doing reverse kegels now and I find that I have to really do them hard for it to help at all.
    Do you think I have somehow started doing them the wrong way or what could be going on here, it is starting to annoy me quite a bit.

  24. Hi Ark

    Sorry to hear you’ve had that problem. I would recommend two things: firstly, stop doing all kegels and rest. Hopefully it will return to normal. Secondly, speak to your doctor about it just to be on the safe side.
    I hope you recover quickly

  25. Stumbled upon your website over a year back. Just recently been reading the information. Your information on reverse kegels is excellent. As a body culture person -I’ve always been gifted with multi-orgasms and high-erotic energy. I gather I had intuitively acquired the gift of reverse kegels back when I was a teen.
    My thoughts: the breath is crucial, however, as an elder everyone will have moments of PE. But, if you have PE and it impacts and effects your sex pleasure and abilities – get help. This web site deserves kudos. Thanks and blessings to you, Ethan. Peace

    1. Hi Jimmy

      Thank you for such a positive and complimentary comment. I really appreciate what you said:-) yes, breathing is important I think, and it’s interesting that you think you gained the reverse kegel control naturally at an early age. Lucky you!
      All the best and thanks again

  26. Hi Ethan,
    Thanks for all the efforts you have put into helping people like us battling with PE. I so much appreciate you and I can say that over and over again.
    I’ve dropped comments here and there but not gotten any response from you. Pls, it’s still about not being able to order for the Ejaculation Trainer from inside Nigeria as the country is absent on the country list. Funny enough, smaller African countries are right there on the list. Kindly help on what to do or tell me where I’m actually getting it wrong in the ordering process as someone residing next to my town was among the testifiers. I have a part belief it’s actually possible to order from Nigeria but I, certainly, have not been going about it the right way.
    Thanks once more in anticipation of your response. My e-mail is included as I would like a direct response also through that channel so as not to stay missing it (your reply) until I come back to this post.

    1. Hi Fred

      I think I replied to one of your comments yesterday. Sorry if I had missed a previous comment or message. I don’t see why you wouldn’t be able to order it from Nigeria. Have you tried a different payment method? As I said before, maybe give them a phonecall and see what’s happening.

  27. Hey ethan,

    So I think I’ve figured out the kegel hold for longer amounts of time. I was wondering how long you think it will take to see some progress? I would like to tell my girlfriend. Also, how many would you suggest I do daily and how long for each hold?


    1. Hi again Eric,

      Nice to hear from you again. I can’t really answer the progress question as everyone is different. But hopefully within a couple of weeks you might start to see some progress. But it’s just a guess. I don’t think there is any harm in sharing the experience with your girlfriend, then you can experiment with pausing to do reverse kegels while you are with her.
      My suggestions for how many and how often are all in the original article. The key is just not to overdo it. I think really you can go with your own body and what it tells you, as long as you are sensible and have days off from doing any kegels.
      All the best

  28. Wait i’m a little confused. once you’ve practiced them,you are not supposed to do kegels during sex until you’re about to ejaculate right? or are you supposed to do them throughout?

    1. Hi Jeff,

      Reverse kegels can be done throughout. Normal kegels are only useful for holding back ejaculation at the last minute, or helping yourself to get a stronger erection in the beginning. That’s how I see it anyway.

  29. Hi Ethan and everybody else,

    Great articles about the kegels and reverse kegels, it makes so much sense.. I didn’t have a PE problem before, but now i do. My problem is i started practicing kegels without reading enough first and i only did normal, without reverse, so i got to a point where my muscles are too tighten and i get to orgasm pretty quick, sometimes even under 1 minute..which sucks. And i didn’t get to a point where i can stop it either. The good thing is i can continue for 2 more times, maybe more and they last longer, however this is not preferred, i’d rather just do it once and do it good. I guess i have to start reverse kegeling. My question is.. do you think i should continue with both normal and reverse kegels ? Or i should just do some reverse until i release the tension and get it balanced ?

    1. Hi Alex,

      Thanks for your comment, and it’s an interesting situation you’ve managed to find yourself in! Especially that about being able to continue afterwards.
      To answer your question, I’m not totally sure to be honest! My feeling would be to suggest doing both, but only a little of the normal and more of the reverse. At least in the beginning until you find things settle down a bit in terms of the tension. Perhaps also try some other relaxation techniques to see if that helps.

    1. Probably not eric, unfortunately. If you have that severe a problem (sorry to call it severe) then you probably need to be doing more than just reverse kegels. I would suggest looking in as much depth as possible into PE. You’ll need to be taking action long before that point to control your arousal levels and reaction to stimulation during foreplay for example.

        1. Hey,

          Sorry for all the commenting but I have one more quick question that confuses me. When you hold a reverse kegel, how are you supposed to do it for an extended amount of time (ex: 10+ seconds) without losing your breath? I can only seem to hold them for a short amount of time using the breathing techniques. (1 second; 2 at most) I can only hold the reverse kegel on the breathe in.


        2. Hi again Eric,

          No problem! I think maybe you’re getting too caught up in the whole breathing thing. Perhaps even squeezing too tightly somehow if you can’t breathe. Try doing it without focusing o your breathing if you’re having trouble. For example, I can do a reverse kegel during the whole time I type this comment without changing by breathing at all. That’s the ultimate goal – to be able to just ‘order’ the area to relax with conscious thoughts rather than having to breathe, squeeze or whatever. The breathing and squeezing is mainly to help you identify the area in the beginning.
          I hope that helps, and feel free to ask questions whenever you like. I enjoy answering, even if it takes a while to get round to it sometimes!

    2. Kegel will help you. To keep arousal in lower stage, you should avoid watching porn. Plus do reverse kegel.

  30. Great post. There is definitely more to all of this than we know. I have just made the connection (after 35 years) that when masturbating I can tell my anus and pelvic floor muscles retract and tighten. No matter what I do I can’t keep them from contracting (likely I just need to train). These contracting muscles lead directly to a faster orgasm. So we all might just be “blessed” with shorter or tighter or weaker or ???? pelvic floor muscles. I trained my PC muscles with regular kegels when I was in high school and was able to have multiple orgasms. It still took me two faster orgasms to get a 3rd decently long one. And it takes work. I’d rather just have control of one orgasm. Now that I’m older and not training I don’t have that ability like I used to. Or the libido or free time to have 3 orgasms with my wife. I will make a focus to train the reverse kegels and regular ones to see what additional control I can get. Keep thinking and experimenting!

    1. Hi John

      Thanks for your comment, and I’m glad you found the article helpful. I can understand what you say about not having the time or libido to put the same energy into your sex life. But maybe it’s just a case of needing to get back into it, and you’ll find you want to make that time…
      Good luck with your new experiments – let me know if you have any joy relaxing the pelvic floor with the reverse kegels.
      All the best

  31. Hi. I’ve been reading a whole lot on this page about kegels and reverse kegels but feel really certain that my problem is not kegel related.

    First of all I am 33. My libido or lust is below low or just plainly not there. When I do get an erection its usually at around 50%. If i do get hard enough many times in the middle of sex I go limp. Its so embarrassing! My free testosterone is at 13.9nmol/l. I believe that if I double my free testosterone many things like my libido would also be back. However I am not sure about why I dont have hard erections.

    1. Hi Kev,

      Thanks for your comment, and sorry to hear you’ve been having some difficulties. I’ve also wondered in the last if I’ve had libido problems, as I’ve been through phases of not feeling any desire to have sex. But I think that’s perfectly normal, especially as you grow older.
      You can always experiment with trying to work on the libido. If you search online you’ll find loads of good articles about natural ways to increase your libido. But you could also try the kegels as it might help in conjunction with other things you try.
      All the best

  32. Hi Ethan , so I only started doing kegels for about 3 days and about 3 sets each day that’s it . I’ve notice my erection is weaker and I haven’t woke up with an erection lately , it’s been 4 days now , what do you think I should be doing or not doing ?

    1. Hi Dan,

      I’d be surprised if it’s the kegels that have affected you if you’ve only been doing them for a few days. It might just be a coincidence. If you’re not convinced though, have a break for a few days and see if they return to full strength.
      But it is quite common though for guys to experience changes in their erections when they start doing kegels. If you’re only doing reverse kegels, then perhaps mix it up with the normal kind too.

    1. Hi Floyd,

      No it’s not necessary per se. It just helps guys in the beginning, but I don’t do any particular breathing techniques any more because I have developed enough awareness of the area to do reverse kegels just by ‘deciding’ to do them.

  33. I’m slightly confused. Do you breathe in and do the kegel at the same time or hold your breath and then do the kegel?

  34. Hey ethan, thanks for the great article again! Have you seen my previous post? Anything would greatly help me! Thanks!

  35. Thanks for the great article!

    I’ve started doing reverse kegels a recently because I have somewhat of an odd problem. Whenever I sleep at night, I wake up a few hours later with a strong upward bending erection that will not subside unless I stand up and walk around or take a pee. After that, I can sleep again for an hour or two before being woken up with the same thing again. I’m exhausted every day from a lack of real sleep, and so far the three urologists I’ve seen have no idea what to do with me. In the day time I don’t have any erection troubles, and after sex or masturbation my erection goes down normally.

    I tried doing kegel daily but they seemed to make the problem worse. I have a feeling it’s something to do with the muscles around my penis and so I’m trying to get a hang of reverse kegels to relax them. I’ve been doing them for a week or so now a few times a day, but as of yet there’s been no immediate improvement in sleep.

    Has anyone had similar problems who may be able to offer some advice? Thanks.

    1. Hi Rezz,

      Thanks for your comment, and sorry to hear you’ve had that problem. Understandably it must be quite worrying, and frustrating to not be sleeping properly.
      I haven’t heard of that exact thing happening, but I have heard of guys having various problems from over-doing kegels, so I’m not sure that it’s the best way to deal with pre-existing problems like yours. And from what you say, am I right in thinking the problem started before you even began doing kegels or anything like that?

      I guess that seeing urologists is the best thing you can do, though it’s a shame they don’t seem to know what’s going on. I’d love to be able to tell you that reverse kegels could help, but to be honest I have absolutely no idea. Perhaps someone else reading this will be able to offer you some advice.

      I will say though that reverse kegels can take much longer than a week to really help with other problems. So you might have to wait a while longer, assuming they do eventually help your particular problem.

      If you do find something which helps, or have success with the kegels, it would be great if you’d take a moment to come back and share the info.

      I hope everything works out ok.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published.