The Start And Stop Method Step By Step

The start and stop method is one of the better techniques for dealing with premature ejaculation. The real beauty of the method is that it can be practiced alone, with your partner or even both.

It can be particularly useful if you’re single and want to work on your stamina before you next meet someone. And if you have a willing partner, it’s a great technique to practice together from time to time, as you’ll see later in the article.

Equally, if you’re not into the idea of practicing such clinical techniques with your partner, you can continue having a natural sex life, but practice the start and stop technique in your own time.

How does it work?

The method involves working out where your point of no return is (when ejaculation is almost inevitable) and stopping before you reach it. The idea being that you develop a better sense of your body’s arousal levels and learn to keep yourself from getting too close to orgasm.

As you’ll see in the steps below you can repeatedly get close to the point, then stop and rest for a while before continuing. Eventually you should find that it takes you longer to reach that point.

The second goal is to develop a better understanding of your arousal levels. So if you get too aroused during sex you can do something about it. That’s when you can call upon other techniques like kegels.

Part 1: solo practice

1. To start with don’t use any extras like lubricant or pornography. Take a minute to relax, then you can masturbate normally using just your hand.

2. When you feel that you’re getting close to climax, stop masturbating. There’s no need to panic and stop too soon before ejaculating, but there’s also no need to push it right to the last second.

3. Rest for about 30 seconds before continuing. You may need to rest for a minute if you pushed yourself too close to the point of no return. While resting try to relax your body. If your thighs or abdomen are tense, try to relax them. Take some slow and deep breaths.

4. Continue to masturbate as before. You should ideally repeat this several times before eventually allowing yourself to climax in a natural way. It’s important that you still get to enjoy the sensation of orgasm.

5. Eventually you should notice that the period of time between getting an erection and hitting the point of no return gets longer. Realistically, it can take a few weeks to start seeing large improvements – stick with it though!

6. After you feel that you’re making some small improvements, you can add one more element: either lubricant or pornography. Only add one to begin with though. You may find at first that you go backwards, and this is nothing to worry about. You will gradually improve again.

If you feel like climaxing as soon as you start up again

When doing the start and stop method, you may find you feel like ejaculating as soon as you start up again after a rest. This may be for one of two reasons:

  • You’re not resting for long enough. 30 seconds is ideal, but you may need a minute for your arousal to drop.
  • You may be pushing yourself too close to the point of no return. In which case your semen has already started its journey and you won’t be able to control it. In future learn to stop a little earlier until you can rest for 30 seconds before continuing.

stop start instructions - stop before point of no returnPracticing with a realistic vagina

Next you can add a realistic vagina to make the technique even more effective. Using one will really help close the large gap between masturbation and sex.

It’s particularly useful if you’ve been single for a while, as the first few times you have sex after a period of being single can be overwhelming. So being better prepared can help ensure your hard work doesn’t fall apart when it comes to the real thing.

If you don’t have one already, you might find it helpful to check out my fleshlight stamina training Unit review.

How long you should aim to last for

The goal is to keep practicing the technique until you can last 15-20 minutes before you first feel the need to ejaculate. This may seem like an unreasonable goal at the moment, but it is possible with practice.

Please note that the time of 15-20 minutes isn’t suggested because this is how long you need to be able to last for a woman to have an orgasm, or even enjoy sex with you. It’s suggested because the time you last for during masturbation and intercourse is likely to be significantly different.

So being able to last for 15-20 minutes on your own is a good length of time to ensure that you can last for at least the average time couples have intercourse for (which is around 5 to 6 minutes). You can eventually work towards an even longer time if you like; the choice is yours and there’s no hard and fast rule about this.

Part 2: the start and stop method with a partner

If you have a partner who’s willing to work with you, then practicing the start and stop method with them is a great way to learn self-control.

And of course this is what you’re ultimately aiming for – improving how long you last with your partner. You may find that practicing alone still slowly improves your actual sex life, but practicing ‘on the job’ is even better.

1. If you’re extremely sensitive, you can start by simply having your partner give you a massage. After that, you can ask them to gently touch parts of your body which are sensitive, but not your groin.

So they can stroke your stomach, your thighs, your side or anywhere that you find sensitive and erogenous. You can kiss or hug as well if you can tolerate the touching without getting too aroused.

2. Ask your partner to masturbate you using just their hand. If you’re not able to control your ejaculation doing this, then this is the level you need to practice at for now until you can tolerate it better.

In the same way as you can do this alone, ask them to stop before you reach the point of no return. Practice the start and stop method with them for 15-20 minutes before allowing yourself to enjoy an orgasm.

3. When you’re able to cope with the excitement of your partner masturbating you for long enough, you can move on to oral sex. If your partner is willing to do this regularly, then it bridges the gap well between using a hand and actual sex.

Unless they really love giving you oral, it may be more realistic to start with their hand, then move on to oral for just a few minutes.

4. When you’re able to stay calm enough to not ejaculate during 15-20 minutes of your partner manually stimulating you and giving you oral sex, then it’s time to move on to the real thing. You may still find the jump is too much, in which case you can build up slowly by just caressing their vagina with your penis before penetration.

5. Initially you can remain motionless once you enter the vagina, not moving for 2-3 minutes until you’re able to cope with the sensation. When you’re able to cope, then it’s time to start the whole process again while having sex. Continue with the start and stop technique until you can last for the length of time you want to during sex.

Notes

If you find you need to stop too many times to reach 15 to 20 minutes, either alone or with a partner, you can change the way you approach it. Instead of stopping 20 times in 20 minutes, only do the process 5 times.

Even if that only means 5 minutes training, eventually it will get better. This can prevent both boredom and frustration with the technique.

Once you’re actually having sex and practicing the start and stop method, it’s really up to you to decide how long you’d like to be able to last for. Some people may think 20 minutes is necessary because that’s how long on average it takes their partner to reach climax.

Some people may be happy with 5-7 minutes because they’re able, through foreplay and oral sex, to bring their partner to climax long before 20 minutes. There’s no universal rule about how long you need to last for when doing the start and stop method. It’s your joint decision as to the kind of time that leaves you both feeling satisfied.

You might also like

If you’re interested in trying more natural techniques you might find it helpful to check out my reviews of some popular premature ejaculation guides.

Additionally, you can check out my guides to kegel exercises and reverse kegels. Although I’m somewhat skeptical of kegels, if you’re interested you’ll find thorough instructions in those articles.

And many readers have said they found the article about how I dealt with premature ejaculation a helpful read.

224 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Hi I mostly masturbate to porn sitting on a hard surface and cum within 30 seconds but when I lay down it’s take more longer maybe a minute or two and when I stand maybe a minute. I was wondering since I’m about to start the stop and go method is it better to sit, stand ,or lay down. Please reply.

    • Hi there
      I think it’s best to do it in the position where you can most relax. Relaxing your body can really help you stay in control, and that’s usually lying or sitting.
      Ethan

  • Hello Ethan

    Thanks Ethan for posting this. I’ve been doing this method for about 6 month or more. Now i can hold it for 20++ minutes most of the time. Im glad i found this post. Thank you very much Ethan.

    • Hi there
      You’re welcome, and that’s fantastic! I often wish guys who’ve spent time practicing the technique would leave a comment to say if they had success with it – or not – so I appreciate your feedback!
      Ethan

  • I have found this to be very interesting, Now I can understand what my husband is doing on the other side of the bed. My question is what makes him have to get up several times and go to the bathroom? And he also will cough during this time. Does those 2 things have anything to do with this techique? Thanks for the article. Denise

    • Hi Denise
      I’m glad you found the article interesting! To be totally honest, I have no idea why he might be doing that. Do you mean when you’re having sex, he repeatedly gets up to go to the bathroom, or during the night? Sorry if it’s a silly question, but it’s not clear from your comment what the exact situation is.
      Ethan

  • Could you give me a penis exercise guide Even though I am no where near done with puberty I would like to increase the size of my penis as well as increase the hardness of my penis during an erection

    • Hi Gino
      I really don’t recommend doing anything like that until you reach adulthood – it’s potentially risky and kind of pointless because you just don’t know what your real final size is yet. There are some easy things you can do to make it appear bigger, which can be very effective – have a look at my article about penis size and enlargement and you’ll find a list of simple ways to do so.
      Ethan

  • Hi Ethan

    Great article – you really are helping lots of men out with what can be a depressing issue.

    I have been with my partner for a year, and have tried using your techniques, with some benefit, but still not lasting long enough to make her reach orgasm. However we have also used desensitising sprays which have really helped in the short term, allowing me to last long enough for her and improving my confidence.

    I have some time away from her now and I have bought a fleshlight training unit to try to improve my stamina without using sprays. I have read Ejaculation Trainer, and am trying to use the techniques relating to breathing, edging and arousal control. Can I ask the following questions:

    1) Did you find the meditation mentioned in the trainer useful? I find it very difficult to do and am not sure if it is beneficial

    2) Ejaculation Trainer says it is best to not ejaculate after each session, maybe only cumming once or twice a week – is there something you found worked for you during your training? Currently I am ejaculating at the end of the sessions but perhaps this is where I am going wrong?

    Once again thanks for this blog, it takes a lot of courage and helps a lot of people!

    Steve

    • Hi Steve

      Thanks for the comment – I’m glad you’ve found the site helpful, and have had some success with your sexual stamina. It can take time to really master your arousal, so keep going with the techniques!

      To answer your questions:

      1. To be honest, I’m not a massive fan of that type of meditation. I think if it doesn’t feel right to you, then don’t worry about it.

      2. Tricky one! I can understand why it says to only ejaculate once or twice a week, but personally I don’t think it really matters. As long as you actually practise the techniques properly, then I don’t see anything wrong with rewarding yourself after you’ve put yourself through an at times punishing session of constantly fighting your arousal levels! I know in tantric sex, the idea of not ejaculating at the end of a session is seen as a powerful tool and could help. But personally, I don’t like the feeling of frustration that this generates, so prefer just to let it go, so to speak.
      So just to be clear, although I think the Ejaculation Trainer is an excellent guide, I don’t think it’s necessary to follow every single piece of advice to the word, especially if you feel uncomfortable with it. And the two points you raised are two which I think you can make your own mind up on.
      I hope that helps!
      Ethan

  • Article is really helpfull and easy to understand but i have a doubt on that, Is the start and stop method first we have to do till start a real sex?
    1-like if i am doing oral sex with my girlfriend at that time i will do this technique till 20 minutes. Than start a real sex ok?

    2-how could i stop when it all coming out like mine it cant stop when its coming out.

    • Hi Sachin
      I’m glad you liked the article!
      No, you don’t have to only do the technique with oral sex until you can reach 20 mins. In some ways it’s good to take things one step at a time, but also you need to think of your girlfriend’s wishes. So you can mix things up as much as you like if she doesn’t want to spend that long on oral sex. The main thing is that you keep focussing on trying to reduce your arousal when it’s getting too much. Which leads me to point 2 – if you are already ejaculation, then you can’t stop it. It means you waited too long before stopping whatever you were doing. You need to recognise when you’re getting to that point and stop before you get there.
      Ethan

  • Thank you for this fantastic article and I have been making fantastic progress. But when I switch to porn or something graphical I cant last more than 1 or 2 minutes. Is this unusual?

    • Hi there
      You’re welcome – I’m glad you found it useful! Yes, it’s very common for guys to ejaculate quicker with those elements added. I think it’s a good challenge to sometimes watch it, but also it’s important to keep doing the technique without relying on porn.
      Ethan

    • Hi there
      It depends totally on the person. I’ve heard reports that even a week can help, mainly because you change the way you think about sex. But usually a few weeks is when you should start to see results.
      Ethan

  • hi ethan,
    i am too depressed and tensed about my situation, i dont feel errection at all. Even if i force myself to the limits i can get the errection only for 2 seconds. It is really not getting hard at all, i dont know what to do. i am 23 and i dont know what to do what exercise or diet can help me, i have no idea, i dont want to go for any surgery or hard treatment, is there anything that i can do by myself, please suggest thank you.

    • Hi Sam
      Sorry to hear you’re having this issue. I think the best thing it so look at some medical websites for information about erectile dysfunction. There’s lots of good information available about it. I’d also recommend speaking to your doctor about it. They can advise you about treatment options, and then you can decide if you want it or not.
      Ethan

  • Great website. I start using your start and stop technique and I started by needing to stop within three to four minutes even without lube. Now I am able to last 15 mins with lube. Over the last three weeks I have started using a flesh light. I can last close to 10 minutes without stopping but I need to be distracted by reading to last this long. If I try to use a flesh light without reading I last only 3 minutes or so and I read but stop reading I feel the urge to ejaculate within a few minutes after I stop reading. Based on this can you please give me your thoughts on why this is happening and also what issue may be causing premature ejaculation for me ? Is it anxiety that I need to work on? What should start doing to get passed the need to stay distracted to last longer?

    • Hi there
      I’m happy to hear you like the website. It’s great that you’ve managed to improve your stamina so much – well done! I don’t think there’s anything wrong with distracting yourself to further improve your time. However, maybe it would be good to find something you could also do during sex, as reading isn’t going to be an option! So you could try focusing your mind away from the penis and to other parts of the body and how they feel. A trick some guys use is to curl their toes while masturbating or having sex. That can take all your focus away from the sexual aspect.
      Then perhaps if you do that for a while, you can slowly work on not having any distraction at all. But for now, I wouldn’t worry too much – you’re heading in the right direction, so just keep practising.
      Ethan

  • Hi Ethan

    While masturbating I ejaculate within 10-20 seconds. I am tensed about my situation. I tried stop-start technique, but though I stop masturbating the sperm comes out after a second or two.

    • Hi there
      If that happens, you need to stop even sooner. I think perhaps in your case then, it would be better to spend time just touching yourself lightly, and not even masturbating in an energetic way. Get used to the feeling of touch and stimulation, and then build up to masturbation.
      Ethan

  • Hi Ethan. R here.
    So I tried the stop and go method because I had a really bad experience. (I eyaculated while masturbating my gf).
    I tried it the very same day that happened.
    In the process i had to stop 4 times in 20 minutes. The difference with your method is that i waited until my boner dissapeared.
    The next day i had sex, a quickly. I went 10 minutes with no urge to come. That night i tried the stop and go method and had to stop only once in 20 minutes.

    All I have to say is: thank you, really.

    R.

    • Hi R
      That’s fantastic! It’s pretty unusual for guys to have such instant results, though I have heard that it can happen in some cases. Perhaps just the knowledge that slowing things down is a good idea helped!
      Ethan

  • Hi ethan..
    First of all thanks for being there to guide and help us all.
    I have a question below
    I am trying start and stop method from more then 3 weeks, when i try this method while standing i can only control for max 3 times( may be 2mins max) then ejaculate..but when i try this laying on my bed i can continue the process for even 35 mins…
    My question is why is this difference in standing and laying position.. ??what u think am i going good with practice??
    One thing to note isi never had sex till now 26 age……..
    And is it necessary to ejaculate after having start stop , because sometimes i slept while having this without ejaculating…
    Please reply to my mail id , i would be a great regard…

    • Hi omm
      It’s better to reply here, so other readers can benefit from any answers too.
      So, I think that perhaps it’s because you relax more when lying down. Standing makes you tighten more muscles, such as the stomach, legs and pelvic floor, which can lead to ejaculating sooner. It could also be more exciting for you, or perhaps because the increased blood flow to the penis from standing makes it more sensitive.
      You don’t have to ejaculate after practising the technique. It’s fine to keep it in if you want to.
      Ethan

  • Hello Ethan its me again.
    I have a few question, but before that ill tell you my progress

    When the last time i comment on this post i keep continuing doing this method.
    i consistently last for 20++ minutes for 6 days. around that day i have a fever too for 3 days. but i feel relieved because fever did not influenced how long i last. although its a bit hard to concentrate because i always thinking to ejaculate soon so i can rest. then after that i stop doing this method for about a week to see if i can still maintain how long i last. after a week, i continue this method and i last for 20 minutes. but my p*nis got chaffed. i think the cause is because i use little lube because its the last drop of my lube. but its still hard to insert my p*nis to the realistic v*agina. so i add a little water so i can insert it easier.

    while i wait my p*nis to heal for around a week im buying another lube with different brand. after a week passed, i continue doing this method. but when i open the lube, the lube feels different. this lube is sticky, not too slippery as the one i have before but it is slippery enough to insert my p*nis to the realistic v*agina, and it dry fast after a few stroke. the good thing is i can feel more sensation. and the bad is because i feel more sensation i can only last 2 minutes, and my p*nis skin is chaffed again. my p*enis chaffed skin keep increasing up until now because its hard to stop doing this and wait for at least a week to heal. even when i can stop doing this for a week my skin still not fully healed yet. so when i doing this again, the skin will be chaffed again.
    because of this problem, i reduce the time i last to around 10 minutes to minimized the damage. but its a bad choice, because now i started to last under 20 minutes again.

    Here is my question

    1. how long does it takes for a chaffed penis to heal ?
    even after a week its still not fully healed yet

    2. do every lubricant different ?
    the one i use now is sticky and not slippery

    3. what does the pre-ejaculate fluid in the woman feels like ? how slippery and sticky it is ? does it is as slippery and sticky as a man pre-ejaculate fluid ?
    the lube i use now is very different compared to my pre-ejaculate fluid. but the lube i have before is almost the same as my pre-ejaculate fluid

    Sorry for my bad english
    Thank you very much

    • Hi there
      Ok, let’s see if I can answer your questions!

      1. I don’t know – it depends on different things. But what I do know is that it’s better to wait until it’s completely healed before continuing.

      2. Yes, all lubricants are different. I don’t like the stickier ones personally, for the same reason – they dry too quickly.

      3. It depends on the woman, and how turned on she is etc. But normally, once they are wet, they stay wet. I don’t know if it’s comparable to lubricant and a fake vagina. Not really, but obviously much closer than a dry hand. But yes, once women are turned on, their natural lubrication is quite slippy.

      My advice would be not to use the realistic vagina with water or dry. Only use it with good lubricant. And don’t worry about the time so much. If 10 mins is how long you last without causing yourself problems, just do that. Or sometimes use your hand and lubricant as that’s less likely to cause chafing.

      Hope that helps!
      Ethan

  • Hi Ethan, thanks for the website. It is very helpful and easy to follow. The information is very relevant and addresses problems that most guys struggle to talk about with others.

    Can you please clarify…with the start and stop masterbation excercise in step 1, is the goal to go 15 – 20 mins without stopping or 15-20 mins with the stops included every 5 mins or so?

    • Hi
      Thanks for the compliment – I’m pleased to hear you found the website helpful. If you can go 15-20 mins without stopping, that’s amazing. But really, you will probably need to stop a few, or even many, times in the beginning. The goal is to one day be able to achieve that time with no stops.
      Ethan

      • When moving through each of the stages (no lube, with lube, with realistic vagina, to real partner) is it important to be able to last the 15mins before moving up to next stage

  • My boyfriend does this but then he gets to the point where he can’t ejaculate at all. We have gone for 45 minutes to an hour and nothing. By that time I’m beginning to get sore and I’ve already had multiple orgasms so I just want him to wrap it up. We usually end up just calling a quits without him ever fully getting off…any ideas on how to fix this?

    • Hi Noelle
      I guess you just need to work out between you when is an acceptable time to go on for. If he’s controlling himself through the start and stop method, then tell him to let himself go sooner. There’s no need for him to keep pushing it if you’re feeling sore.
      Ethan

  • Hello, Ethan,

    I messaged you a couple months back. I timed myself for 10 minutes and always took note of when I started and stopped so I can track my progress. I’ve definitely improved; however, I have one final question:
    If I completely stop masturbating, let’s say for X amount of months, will my endurance improve or remain the same?
    I find myself doing this and ejaculating before the 10 minute period bc I get too excited, then i get upset bc I’m not being consistent.
    Although I just stated the issue leading to my failure, I’m mainly concerned if no masturbation for a long period of time will improve endurance.

    Thanks in advanced,

    Anonymous.

    • Hi there
      It’s great to hear you’ve made progress! If you stop masturbating, it’s unlikely your endurance will stay high. I think masturbation itself helps guys remain used to stimulation. And I also think it’s good to keep practicing the technique, as it does seem that the endurance will slowly drop back down for many guys if they go back to fast masturbation.
      Ethan

  • I’ve tried this method for a while and I feel like I’m not seeing the results I want. I got myself to around a minute of stimulation with no porn or lube and after that I just always feel the need to ejaculate. I feel like I’m always at an insanely high level of stimulation no matter what I do, the only way I can last longer is to barely stimulate it at all. I just don’t feel like I’m making any progress because of how sensitive I am, is there anything I can do?

    • Hi Thomas
      Some guys are just very physically sensitive, and will find methods like this more difficult. Have you ever tried a desensitizing product? You might find that it helps you. You could then try the technique using a delays spray or even just a normal condom for example. That way you can work out how much you need to reduce the physical sensitivity to last longer during sex.
      Ethan

  • This is a very well described article, and I look forward to trying out, but I have a specific question.

    I don’t have a large penis, I’m maybe 6 inches and my current partner has pointed out that the best sensation for her is right before I climax, the “second last” thrust.

    Will prolonging my climax mean that this final sensation is longer? Or just later? IE: having more stamina/endurance might not be the best thing for me if it’s not enjoyable in the first place.

    • Hi Ross
      I’m glad you found the article useful. To be honest, I’m not sure what the effect might be if you prolong orgasm. I think some of the pleasure may be an emotional one, knowing you’re about to orgasm giving her pleasure. But also maybe because the penis swells before orgasm. Perhaps if you can prolong your orgasm and ride that pre-orgasm stage, it might be more intense for her. You’ll have to experiment!
      Ethan

  • Hello Ethan
    First, thanks for sharing this method. Ive made so much improvement

    I have some question

    So ive been doing this for a month or more. when i first trying this method i only last around 2 minutes but after a few days or a week i can hold it for 20++ minutes

    Then i start adding lubricant
    well it goes back to around 2 minutes
    im a bit down but i keep doing it
    Then when i can hold it for 20++ minutes

    Then i add a realistic v*gina
    This time it goes back to around 5-10 minute. im happy that it doesnt goes back to 2 minutes.

    Then when i can already hold it for 20++ minutes i try adding a p*rn. well i only last for 2 minutes the first time. this is the hardest part. i keep failing to stop before climaxing because im to excited. then after a week or more. i force myself before climax, well i dit but i feel a bit angry but it pays. the next day i can hold for 3 minutes. then the next day i can last 5 minutes. then 8 minutes. then after a few days i can hold it for 15 minutes.

    then when i try switch to a new p*rn, it goes back to 2 minutes again. im very sad, how can this happen ?

    my question is :

    1. Why it goes back to 2 minutes when i switch to a new porn ? is it normal ?

    2. Since i came fast when switching to a new p*rn, is it normal to came fast when you sleep with a new partner ? ( i never had sex )

    3. if i already can hold it for 20 minutes, do i must keep doing this to keep my stamina ?

    sorry for my bad english
    thanks

    • Hi there
      First of all, well done for such great progress! It’s nice to read about the exact progress a reader made from reading my article, so I really appreciate you taking the time to describe this.
      To be honest, I’m not entirely sure why you’d have such a dramatic fall in time when watching the new porn. I’m wondering if perhaps it’s because part of the reason you have trouble with your lasting time is psychological, like many men. Perhaps the mental excitement and novelty factor are having an effect. Maybe you could try watching it, but not allow yourself to fantasize too much about it. And to be honest, it might actually be better to not watch much porn if you’ve never had sex. It might be creating unrealistic expectations about what it will be like. I’d say you can probably keep practicing the technique, but just using your imagination most of the time. Perhaps occasionally watch porn just for some variety, but it’s not necessary.

      It’s impossible to say how you’ll do with a new partner. Hopefully your dedication will work out though – you just need to keep your mind in check as well as your body.

      In terms of keeping practicing, well that’s up to you. You might need to keep it up, or you might find you just have better control now. You need to keep an eye on things and see how you go.

      Ethan

      • Hello Ethan, Thanks for replying !
        Well i think youre right. the cause of the problem is im too excited. because i was thinking “oh i will do this with a new girl”, “oh im wonder what it will be like”, etc.
        Hmm i didnt know that i musnt watch p*rn too much while doing this method. i never watch hardcore p*rn like loud and excessive moan, extreme position, etc. because its a turn off and sounds unreal for me. i only like watching soft p*rn like, normal moan or etc, normal position, etc. is the soft p*rn i described counted too ?

        Yesterday im switching to another p*rn. but this time i last around 4-5 minutes ( i think i can last more, but since i must work so i become a bit anxious ). So i was in despair that time, then i just switch to another p*rn. then when im about to climax i was doing kegel. but this time is different. since i was in despair, i push so hard ( i didnt know how to explain it in english, but its like i clench so hard down there, maybe its like straining doing bowel movement but its not straining or maybe its like holding your pee, but i holding it so hard this time ). then the feels to ejaculate is lessen. i didnt know that i was doing it wrong all the time.

        Yes i hope my hard work will pays, thanks Ethan !

        Well i think ill try to stop for a week then a month to see if i can keep it after i can stabilize doing this method for around 20 minutes.
        I hope i can post it about my result.

        Thanks Ethan.

        • Hi there
          You’re very welcome. I’m glad you found my answer helpful.
          To be honest, there’s no rule about using porn or not. So it’s not that you’re doing anything wrong. I just think maybe in your case it might be beneficial to have a break – from hardcore and softer stuff! Like you say, try for a week and see what happens.
          Ethan

  • Hi Ethan,

    How many times i have to do start and stop techinque in a week to cure PE. Could you please advice and not like more i do it will reduce. And if i do this technique more then in future whether it will effect to my sex life or health issue?.

    • Hi Akhil
      It’s really a difficult question to answer because everyone will progress at a different speed. Personally, I think you can do it every day if you want to. But even if you only do it 2 or 3 days a week, you should still see progress over time. The only effect it should have on your sex life is to improve it hopefully! And no, your healthy won’t suffer because of this technique.
      Ethan

    • Hi Khaalid
      Thanks for that compliment! It’s always good to know readers appreciate an article and the comments.
      Ethan

  • So just to dumb it down the steps are to masturbate without porn and lotion until I’m about to cum than stop until my boner goes away and repeat? How many times should I do this in one session? When should I ejaculate or should I even ejaculate? How long do I have to do this to see improvement ?

    • Hi there
      Yes, that’s right apart from the part about losing the erection. It’s not about erection loss, but more about lowering your arousal level. If you wait for the erection to go away, it could be too long a wait. Often, you’ll only lose 20-30% in that 30 second waiting time. You can do it up until a set time passes, which could mean twice or 10 times depending on your stamina at the moment. Or you can just decide on a number of times to stop and start. It’s up to you to decide which goal to work on. And maybe you can change them one day to the next. There’s no real rue. In terms of improvement, it’s impossible to say. But within a couple of weeks of regular practice you should start to see some improvement. It could take just a few weeks to see serious results, or it could be a couple of months. The key is to stick with it and not give up!
      Ethan

  • Hi Ethan,

    First off, just wanted to thank you for helping us, guys.
    So, after reading your article, I experimented on how long I could last without any material or lotion. I easily managed to last 20 minutes, could have gone for longer I feel like. But when I masturbate to pictures or videos of naked/ dancing women or whatever (really dislike porn), I can only last a short amount of time at the beginning, prob. around 1-2 minutes without stopping, then I have to rest for some time time. I can go on like this for like 20 minutes but it’s not really enjoyable when later on you have to stop like every 10 or 15 seconds. I’ve been practising this method for quite some time now, but I still can’t last that long. What would you suggest? I’ve also started doing kegel exercises (not your routine though).

    • Hi there
      You’re very welcome! I’m glad you found the website helpful!
      So, let’s have a look at your question. First of all, it’s great that you can last that long with just physical sensitivity. I guess that means your issue is one of mental stimulation rather than purely physical. So, I have two possible ideas to try:

      1. Try stopping a bit sooner. If you feel like ejaculating within 10-15 seconds, it might mean you’re pushing yourself too close to the point of no return. So perhaps try to keep yourself at a lower level of arousal.

      2. Try watching the videos you like, but not engaging too much mentally. Try to keep calm, breathe slowly and deeply and not allow yourself to engage in a full fantasy of what might be with the women, if that makes sense? You could even perhaps try watching it, but instead of focusing on the sensations in your penis, focus on your body in general. So in a way, distract yourself from the fantasy and excitement, but don’t worry about thinking about anything negative or unpleasant. Just try to reduce the mental intensity.

      I hope that helps!
      Ethan

  • Hi Ethan,
    I am harikesh, your website is amazing.i have started stop start technique from today but i have some questions please answer :
    Q.1 I want to know is it compulsory to ejaculate after each (solo)session?

    Q2 How many days in a week should i do stop – start technique?

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